Success after 60! Where to start with Sher?

Time sensitive announcements and any discussion that doesn't seem to fit anywhere else.

Moderators: BarbaraSher, Tituba

Success after 60! Where to start with Sher?

Postby Raven » Thu Feb 17, 2000 7:41 am

Greetings from a new member. What a wonderful bulletin board, so full of intelligent, capable, and helpful people. I've just found it after reorganizing my bookshelf and realizing (once again) that I have all five of Barbara's books (there are only five, aren't there?) and over the years have browsed around in all of them, and made fitful starts at doing the various exercises, but not worked my way consistently through any one. All this casual activity has not been for nothing, of course--I've absorbed many of the principles, and that, plus life experience and reflection on same, have enabled me to focus on the meaning of my life and consider how to express it actively in ways that will be fulfilling. But I need to be more consistent and more persistent. Now my specific question is this. I still believe that even after 60 it's not too late. Nevertheless, time presses. How can I use my time most efficiently in reconsidering Barbara's books? Should I start with the first one and work through them chronologically? That doesn't sound desirable, and I mistrust my ability to stick with such a program anyway. More appealing is the thought of beginning with I Could Do Anything... or Live the Life... or It's Only Too Late... (what an inspiring and true title). A couple of years ago I started working through I Could Do Anything and actually got further with it than with any other "exercise book" (they flood the market) I had ever tried. But once again, I paused, and the pause lengthened, and I lost most or all of the benefit. The books overlap somewhat, I know, and probably I couldn't go wrong by just pointing with my eyes closed and starting in, since they all have such worth. But if anyone can suggest one over the others, I'd appreciate it. And if anyone can suggest ways of staying motivated and keeping on track, I'd appreciate that too. I am in that territory, familiar to many, of working in a profession that I'm good at and have much experience in, but which is not ultimately fulfilling. It pays the bills and buys me the time for doing things like hanging out on this bb and working through Barbara's exercises, but there's more, I know. For me, change has been just over the horizon for so long I am not going to put up with it any more. This year I will get right up to the horizon and see what's over the edge.
Raven
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby Jacque » Thu Feb 17, 2000 3:15 pm

Raven, welcome! Have you identified what you want to do? If so, I'd start with <u>Wishcraft</u>. If you're still trying to identify what you want, then <u>I Could Do Anything</u> would be the place I'd start. --<A HREF=http://www.eskimo.com/~jacquem>Jacque</A>
User avatar
Jacque
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 752
Joined: Tue Jul 27, 1999 10:01 pm

Postby Raven » Thu Feb 17, 2000 6:20 pm

Jacque, thanks for your welcome--and what a fine suggestion. Yes, I do know my intention. After writing the initial post I looked over the last 3 books and thought I'd start with Live the Life... I sorta had the idea that Wishcraft had perhaps been somewhat superseded by the later books (despite all the postings here concerning the Wishcraft exercises). After reading your reply I went back to Wishcraft and yes, it is the place for me to start. The last time I read it (or read at it) was so long ago that it is fresh for me now, and very timely. Barbara's words in the introduction (p. xii) about having started and stopped, been inspired and uninspired, etc. so many times ring very true for me. I thought, if she knows how to get around this huge character fault (which is what I've always thought of it as), then the work in this book is what I need to do now. Also her opening words in the introduction about winning -- the desirability and indeed inevitability of winning if we allow it to happen -- chime perfectly with the book I was reading just before this (there are no coincidences, eh?): my paperback copy of Winning by David Viscott, MD. It's nearly 30 years old and very succinct and valid; I heartily recommend it. Am on a bit of a high now from starting/restarting this effort, reading everyone's postings, feeling the encouragement -- and I know myself all too well: day after tomorrow I'll ask myself "What was all that about" or let it drop and fade away and be obscured by immediate necessities, even though this exercise aligns me with my most cherished dreams. More than anything, therefore, what I hope for from this bb is, to put it bluntly and more boldly than I'm accustomed to, a little cheering from time to time, which will help me persist. My family and friends are supportive, but there's something very specific about having encouragement from people who are oriented to this particular set of practices. Oh, oh, torn between writing more (rambling more) + reading other people's postings, and getting back to the Wishcraft exercises....
Raven
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby Kevin » Fri Feb 18, 2000 8:57 am

Raven. Let me give you my support and encouragement for restarting your life at 60. I think there are too many negative beliefs about age in our society. For some bizarre reason if you haven't made it by 30 it's already too late! This isn't true. I'm 38 and I'm starting over again. Raven. You have much to give and much to live for. Your dreams and goals are not only important for you, but they also important for me, as well, if only to serve as an example to all of us during our life transformations, that there are no limitations, only self imposed limitations. Age is a self imposed limitation, as I am beginning to learn. I'm starting with Wishcraft, as well. I'm new to Ms. Sher's writings and I find them very refreshing. Let me give you a thumbs up. I love these message icons. Go for it! Kevin
Kevin
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Feb 14, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby cd1225 » Thu Feb 24, 2000 8:38 am

Hi Raven, You articulated beautifully a big part of where I am. You are fortunate that you know what you want. I still haven't figured out "what I want to be when I grow up" (and I'm 60, too!). Someone posted on this board that they wanted to start a Success Group in Chicago, several people had already responded, I responded too, and now we're emailing back and forth about getting a group started! One of the reasons I want to do that is motivation. If I'm getting together with my success group next Tuesday, I'll be motivated to get my "homework" done! Would that help your motivation too? Carol
cd1225
Regular Poster
Regular Poster
 
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Feb 17, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby Juneface » Wed Mar 22, 2000 6:15 pm

I'm 62 now, but what got me in gear at the age of 55 was actually lot of ideas puncutated with a a lot of "meditating." Now meditating takes on lots of different forms. It can be just plain prayer, or even Zen-like contemplation if that's what works for you. For me it's taking my protable CD player and putting on the earphones and sitting out in the yard with full view of the sky (morning, noon or evening)and listening to wonderful music. (Movie soundtracks can have some great mood music). What is nice is that during the day, even with the earphone you can ear the birds singing in the background. I do believe we have an energy and that nature surrounds us and we can get more energy and strength from being the midst of it; feeling soft breezes on your face and watching clouds and the stars. For just those moments I forget about my arthritis and sciatia and all the other things in reality that await me...and I try to open up my soul to all that's around me. Sometimes I just remember my late mother and sister and try to remember the sound of their voices or give thanks that they live on in my heart. However, I also utilize this time to seek the ability to sharpen my instincts so that I will know what to do or which direction to take. If I'm sad..I cry a little. Whatever I need at that moment. It wasn't until I began doing this that anything began really changing in my life. When I began embracing the beautiful world that is right out in my back yard, did I begin to venture beyond it. I know this all sounds silly, but it worked for me. Now I wish I could figure out how to get rid of this hacking flu-bug cough that's been hanging around for 3 weeks. LOL June
Juneface
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Mar 17, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby Raven » Thu Mar 23, 2000 9:24 am

Thanks, Juneface, and welcome to this site. You boldly state your age as 62 and I will be similarly bold and tell you how timely your message is, as I will be 62 tomorrow. And yes, both meditation and prayer are important in my life; it's good to have your reminder and reinforcement. The outdoors has always been nourishing to me, too. My part of the country is exceptionally beautiful, but there are days when I realize I have been so engrossed in work that I don't even notice, and have passed up a perfectly fine opportunity to be on the Earth. With the arrival of spring and the support of this bb, I'll be out there more often. Getting back to the original subject of this thread, I'm still working slowly through Wishcraft and have done the color exercise on blue--a color I have always found sustaining (the serenity and deep peace of sky and water, the nobility of royal blue, the transformation of sadness and despair into beauty that blues music accomplishes). I'm still mulling over what that exercise tells me about me. Every exercise gets me (and I think all of us who do them) a little further along. Raven
Raven
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby billsfan » Sat Jul 15, 2000 3:16 pm

raven-- im 52 and i want to be what i wanted to be since i was3! an actress. i was side-lined withkids, working, etc.. but you start to realize life is too precious to just exist. i have an office job- i HATE IT!!!!! i truly believe that if theres something you want to do-- you should do it, you may be in for a big surprise
billsfan
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby Raven » Sat Jul 15, 2000 6:28 pm

Billsfan, go for it. How right you are that what one has loved all one's life must be honored. And thanks for your response; I was off the web for a couple of months while my browser was nonfunctional; solved problem by getting another browser; glad to be back in this forum. Are you near acting classes, community theatre groups, or anything of that sort? I know lots of people who may or may not ever be on the professional stage (which I've heard from acting pros can be a vicious scene) but find great fulfillment in community theatre. Is that possibly the way to go for you?
Raven
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Feb 16, 2000 11:01 pm

Postby dharma blue » Sun Jul 16, 2000 12:26 pm

Raven - I'm new to the board and just read your posting (it's nice that ones recently responded to pop back up to the top!) - though my life situation is different (I'm 27) I have the same problem regarding "motivation". Every time I pick up something very useful, like Barbara's book (I have "I Could Do Anything..."), I feel a surge of motivation and the joy of having a purpose, only to find a few days later it's faded and gotten stuck behind the grind of daily life. I posted something a few weeks ago about motivation, and Barbara's reply was that everyone needs that support group to keep going. I never really thought of it that way, but I agree with you and her - sometimes friends/loved ones aren't the right type of people to keep you on track. My significant other is great, but he simply can't comprehend what keeps me from "just doing" things. (Sometimes I can't either!) Please post any time you need a reply or encouragement - reading through these bulletin boards the past few weeks, I am amazed at the openness and helpfulness of everyone here. Carol, I am in Chicago too - I have talked to Debra about a group and I would love to help out/get involved in any way! After reading the replies to Raven's posting, I am going to go get a copy of Wishcraft - I think I may have focused on something, and it sounds as though Wishcraft will help in that arena. Raven, good luck, and keep posting messages. Image Love, dharma
dharma blue
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 23
Joined: Mon Jun 26, 2000 10:01 pm

Postby JC » Mon Jul 17, 2000 7:21 am

Welcome ‘back’! Good for you for ‘doing the exercises’. Since you know what you want, care to share it with us? I get the sense you could do with some support to ‘keep you on track’, yes? If so, I highly recommend finding or creating a Success Team. Check out www.shersuccessteams.com I am in Andrea’s team in NY at the moment and I am so grateful for its support.
JC
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 230
Joined: Sun May 07, 2000 10:01 pm

Postby Thayer » Mon Jul 17, 2000 7:27 am

I missed this post first time around, so I am glad to read it now. I, too, find that I drop things that originally seemed useful and life altering. However, I've never had a support group before, either Image I've been trying to work through _Live the Life. . ._, and after being initially very excited, I got bogged down in chapter three with listing my emotions. I just picked it up again last night. This speaks to something that I have been giving a lot of thought lately--a message I have been getting from a lot of different places. Resistance means you're often about to embark on the thing you really need. (Of course, sometimes it also means you're about to make a really stupid decision! But I think if we're truly honest with ourselves we can see the difference most of the time.) So I have gradually worked my way back around to chapter three and am giving it another go. My points would be that you do need a support group; you need to be aware that sometimes you push away the stuff that's really going to be helpful; and you don't have to do it all at once. Sometimes you might need to put the book down for a couple weeks and think about your resistance and then pick it up again. This realization came to me when Barbara said to date all your cards and exercises. Why? I thought, I'm doing them every day. Ha, well, I'm not.
Thayer
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 304
Joined: Thu Jun 08, 2000 10:01 pm

Postby DebraG » Mon Jul 17, 2000 7:27 am

I posted this (since it was being discussed) in a different area, but it's being discussed here, too, so I'll say that I'm going to do the work necessary to do the Success Teams. I have absolutely no time up until my vacation, but upon my arrival back home, that is the first thing I'm going to do. I'm really looking forward to this! Debra (this is the last place I'll "discuss" it) Image
DebraG
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 645
Joined: Wed Aug 18, 1999 10:01 pm

Postby BarbaraSher » Mon Jul 17, 2000 7:30 am

Raven, listen to Thayer. We *can't* do these things on our own. That's not how we're built. Where are you located? You need a Success Team! Come over to my new website and see if we have any teams in your area. www.SherSuccessTeams.com
BarbaraSher
Mega Poster
Mega Poster
 
Posts: 6181
Joined: Wed Jul 21, 1999 10:01 pm

Postby shelble » Mon Jul 17, 2000 6:23 pm

Have any of you ever participated in a Success Team or similar group?. What are other people's thoughts about becomming a leader? ------------------ shelley
shelble
New Poster
New Poster
 
Posts: 14
Joined: Sat Jul 15, 2000 10:01 pm

Next

Return to General Discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest

cron