Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Find each other here and set up your own informal Success Teams. Registered leaders will visit and can be asked questions.

Moderators: Tituba, BarbaraSher

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby LalithaN » Sat Jul 06, 2019 7:02 am

mikeisjoyous wrote:First, hi LalithaN. It's interesting to me when you talk about the challenge of being born. My mom had a hysterectomy when she had me. I guess I failed that challenge:( I once created my own rebirthing exercise. It felt very powerful to me, but I did not change my bad behaviors afterwards Come to think of it, I tried many different psychological methods, but I never changed my behavior. Looking back, I think I saw my not changing as a sign of strength, of invulnerability...sigh
Mike

Hi Mike,
I think I have covered all the arguments that may arise.If you doubt that, read my post again.

When I typed that post, I thought of caesarian babies immediately, that's why I added these lines.
"After 10 months of heavy luxury, one day we are suddenly kicked out of the Paradise headlong through a tight dark tunnel.Would we survive this choking tunnel? Is that the end of suffering? No. We arrive to an alien place where light pierces the eyes, wind blows through the skin and sounds beat in the ears and above all we have to breathe for ourselves and use our mouth to appease our hunger. No comfort walls to protect and cover us. We were so small and defenceless, but we came out of that crisis successfully. "
Coming into this world also contains the mental turmoil why our paradise is pushing us out? Can we regain that?And more to the agony it is not the only test.
In whatever method you came into this world, getting used to it ruggedness, despite the great protection you had had, is a real challenge and no one can avoid that including an incubator baby.
Then, that message was given to help you in your struggle to take some action. If it does that, then the purpose is achieved. If it rises only more arguments, sorry for agitating you a bit more.
LalithaN
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2019 5:26 pm
Location: Chennai, India

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby SquarePeg » Sat Jul 06, 2019 7:23 am

Yes, I am a guy (male) named Guy. It's too clever. I'm also married, and generally avoid flirting with attractive women. But no, I don't run or even avoid them -- I was sort of joking.

Yes, initially my GP provided follow up care for sleep apnea. But when he died, the records regarding the sleep study were difficult to track down. In fact, only a summary report could be located, not the actual data. When the CPAP machine needed to be replaced, the insurance company required the sleep study data plus data from the machine that demonstrated compliance. But the machine's interface was broken and so both sets of data could not be provided. Thus it was that I paid cash for the new machine. I hope this doesn't happen to you!

I did not know of the book -- thanks for the recommendation!
SquarePeg
Mega Poster
Mega Poster
 
Posts: 1175
Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:36 pm

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sat Jul 06, 2019 8:37 pm

LalithaN, I can't really cry now, but I wish I could. Not because if childbirth, but because I am alone now. I so much want a friend or girlfriend here now.

I was thinking about the sensitive way you describe being born. I suspect you could be a rebirthing therapist if you would like doing that. LeBoyer wrote a couple of books about that.I thought the picture of a newborn baby smiling at n his book was really fabulous
Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sat Jul 06, 2019 8:52 pm

Hi Guy, today I listened to some samples of music that is supposed to help folks sleep. It's called Wholetones. The cheapest iteration of it costs $49. I like what I heard. I triedlistening to some musical samples and to a sleep ok tape I have from Dr Nathaniel Branden
Seemed helpful. I will actually buy the MP3 files Monday and give it a serious trial If it really works for me, I will definitely tell you. I have tried sleep supplements, with no help. Maybe if combine the music, the sleep tape later, and then the supplements or perhaps half an ambien pill.
Bye for now
Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby LalithaN » Sun Jul 07, 2019 12:22 am

mikeisjoyous wrote: I can't really cry now, but I wish I could. Not because if childbirth, but because I am alone now. I so much want a friend or girlfriend here now.


Hi Mike,
I sympathize with you. Loneliness is very hard. If you are without people surrounding you, that situation can be assessed in two ways.
1. Loneliness
2. Solitude
Loneliness can be felt, even among a crowd and that indicates you are not in accord with your own self and that is a bane. Whereas Solitude is a bliss, where you are one with yourself. When you are in solitude the world is with you. This is not just philosophy or poetry, just truth.I can write a lot about this but here this is enough.

You say you want friend or a girlfriend. Here in this forum, we support each other to cope with our problems and I have benefited myself very much from this forum. So you have friends here. About girlfriend, most of the relationships bring only pain. In my opinion, single persons are the most lucky. They only have to handle themselves.
About solitude and single, I recommend you 'Choose ME before WE' by Christine Arylo. A very good book. I read only a part of this book and I started practising . That was enough for me and I didn't finish.

What is rebirthing therapy?
LalithaN
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2019 5:26 pm
Location: Chennai, India

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sun Jul 07, 2019 5:40 am

I will look for Arylo's book. You have to risk pain doing anything, LalithaN.
Rebirthing therapy is where people go back in their pasts to when they were born and learn to accept the pain, and light and sounds of being born.
There is a birthing therapy book out there.
Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby SquarePeg » Sun Jul 07, 2019 6:54 am

Hi Mike, have you looked for the music in your public library system? I found the following in the library system that my library belongs to:
Wholetones : the healing frequency music project / Michael S. Tyrrell

I find that sleep is deeper and less interrupted for me if my last meal of the day is small and higher carb (such as a bowl of rice and beans), and/or if I drink an herbal tea blend of lavender, chamomile and perhaps poppy seed. Avoiding caffeine after 2pm or so is important, too. Sleep is affected by lunar phase -- maybe some days of the month we can do nothing about it except expect to be "off" some days.
SquarePeg
Mega Poster
Mega Poster
 
Posts: 1175
Joined: Tue Jan 26, 2010 9:36 pm

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby LalithaN » Sun Jul 07, 2019 9:52 am

Oh God!
I read both of your insomnia posts. And you are spending a lot of money, time and effort to control it.Really terrible.

I am/ was a good sleeper and if I miss my sleep now and then, I used to fret. The famous line of our house is my boys to each other, 'Hi bro, don't disturb Mom's sleeping. She'll pounce and bite for the whole day'. Though they make this much hype, the divine purpose of their birth is to interrupt my sleep knowingly or unknowingly. Now I'm used to insomnia so that I take it easily and even make use of it.
Now coming to the point, Gentlemen, shall I ask whether you have tried traditional cures for insomnia. Have you tried yoga? It is a very good cure for most of the physical and mental ailments. Then Ayurvedic Shirodhara method. An authorized Ayurvedic physician has to recommend it and do the treatment to you. If you can't avail these methods, then I have some simple solutions.
1. A good whole body oil massage especially for head and face.
2. A good hot/ cold water bath 1 hour before going to bed as per the climate.
3. A slow but steady walk for 1 km [to and fro] after a nourishing supper.
4. A glass of hot chocolate milk before bed.
5. Doing nightly prayers/auto suggestions/meditation sincerely according to your faith.
6. Reminiscing our deeds of the day and feeling satisfaction for our actions[To fulfill this you have to do some useful deed everyday].
7. Relaxation on bed and simple breathing exercises in the lying position.
8. Even after all of this you are awake, focus your mind and count 1,2, 3 as much as you can.

Another one, though it may look stupid, but I'm sure it will work.
If you are below 55, join some group of teenage boys to play football, volleyball, cricket, basketball some team sport like that and play with them daily for atleast 1 hour. In 15 days if done regularly, most of your ailments will go vanished.
If you are above 55, then assemble a group of children below 10, and play with them seriously whatever they are playing like kite flying, running race, sack race, kabbadi, Go or anything like that.
Mostly they won't admit you in their group, somehow coax them.
But NO virtual games.

Try and tell me the results.
LalithaN
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2019 5:26 pm
Location: Chennai, India

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:03 am

Gee Guy, I never thought Wholetones would be in the library. I will check it out here.

Yes, I do better if I take an apple before sleep.

Lunar cycles? Wow, I never heard of that one before.
Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sun Jul 07, 2019 10:17 am

Hi LalithaN, the one thing that speaks to me is doing some mild exercise earlier in the day. I have an exercycle at home. I understand that if I exercise 3 minutes twice)day that my blood sugar will improve. That may help my sleep. Probably the next thing to do to not take more than 2 naps during the days I am not working. Third thing would be the music-hypnosis supplemented by supplement or drug.

So having your sleep interrupted is God's divine purpose for you?:) Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby Elaine Glimme » Sun Jul 07, 2019 5:50 pm

Hi,

Mike, You asked for our stories. Here's mine.

I'll let you guess whether my log on name is my real name.

As far as health issues go, I've had biopsies three times, but I was lucky. I had no idea that cancer was a possibility until they took the biopsy, and I didn't really have a chance to be scared before they told me that the biopsy came back negative. I've had surgery three times, and I can say that the medical profession makes it a lot easier and more comfortable than in the scary old days. I've had a hip replaced, a cataract removed and a hysterectomy. (Yes, I'm a woman.)
When I'm scared, which is often, I find comfort in a lot of the things LalithaN wrote about. Prayer helps me. Friends usually help me, although, being people, sometimes they say exactly the wrong thing. That said, friends are usually comforting, and their intentions are good.

I've been posting on the Boards for a long time, and I find it helps.

As far as procrastination goes, I'm an expert procrastinator. In fact, I've wanted to get some writing done, and I've been procrastinating all day. I finds the Boards helpful in overcoming procrastination. And my friends that I see face-to-face are helpful in motivating me to get my work done. When I write every day, I find I can write. When I stop writing, it's hard to start up again.

I like your log on name "Mikeisjoyous"

A note about dates. If no one has posted on thread in a long time, it's probably because the original people writing it have gone away. Maybe they're emailing each other. Maybe they just gave up. If the subject is interesting to you, you can pick up the thread. It will move to the top of the list of threads. Just as this thread did.

This Board is informal, and wherever you post on here, the people tend to be supportive and kind. There are really no rules about what to post - just be kind and courteous.

Now I'll try to get some writing done.
Elaine Glimme - author - "Temporary Address" and "The Molly Chronicles"
User avatar
Elaine Glimme
Mega Poster
Mega Poster
 
Posts: 2879
Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2008 1:00 pm

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Sun Jul 07, 2019 8:12 pm

Hi Elaine:) First off, I feel confident Elaine is your actual name. So...hi Elaine:)

I'm glad that friends help you. I do like the people here and hope that we can get to know each other both on the boards and off it. I have decided to also put in for a yearlong subscription with Hanging Out With Barbara. I have a little spare money to do that now. When I think of my childhood and my life generally, I feel like I'm encountering a veil of pain except at such times as I felt like a trained fog, pleasing my teachers with my creativity, but not doing things for myself. I hope that the Hanging Out thing will help cut through the pain so I can have a life.
Sorry about the surgery. I had knee surgery when I was 20 and had a motorcycle accident. Then at I think age 60 I had colon cancer surgery. I did not opt for chemo or radiation afterwards. Instead I found a doctor who was into herbs and vitamins in order to build up my immune system instead of tearing it down. Seemed to work. No recurrence
Are you a writer? What kind, if so?
I have had a problem making myself move to do things. Up till now Barbara's daily emails haven't helped a lot. But today I began reading Mind Over Matter by Peter Hollis. It is about self-discipline. Suddenly I connected that book with what Barbara is doing and boom! My resistance to movement went down about 80%. I exercycled twice so far. Also instead of eating a whole pizza, I only felt like eating half. I gave no idea if I will extend my goals, but this is certainly worth mentioning m
Best to you Elaine,
Mike
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby LalithaN » Sun Jul 07, 2019 11:37 pm

Hi Mike,

I think you didn't read my post carefully. I offered two diff solutions for your insomnia. One is Yoga and another some sports with teenagers. These two are not just physical exercises.

First one. Yoga . In this, head, spine, limbs, breath and mind are all coordinated. The positions may be different,but the theme is the same. Mind,body and breath all aligned together. You should not loose this coordination even for a moment. So complete mindfulness is achieved. And also relaxation is a must in Yoga practices. So Yoga cures many diseases and mental disorders.

Second. A team sport with teenage boys. They belong to your gender, so no distractions. Then when you are playing with teenagers [persons who take their game seriously and play just for its sake], you will have no time to ponder what is the purpose of hitting the ball to the goal, how many calories I'm going to lose when I hit this ball, how to maintain my dignity among these silly geese etc... You have to mingle with their enthusiasm and that is highly infectious. Though at first hard, after some time, you will become one of them and play just for play's sake. You have no idea that your body is being exercised. But you are having fun. No thinking, just action. So complete mindlessness. A great therapy for insomnia.


I read many of your posts. I formed an idea about you. I'm neither a physician nor a psychiatrist. But it is my hobby to observe and evaluate human behaviour. Don't think me rude, I'm just frank. Maybe my opinion can help you, if not, don't bother. You are overthinking. All your physical and mental problems arise from this. The cure for you is 'stop thinking and start doing'.
If you have two naps[even 10 mins duration] a day, then you need not worry about insomnia.

Why can't you post in other threads too, like Daily stepping, Exercise? In these threads we appreciate every single step taken towards your goal. Instead of focusing on what you can't or didn't do, focus what you can do [however imperfect that maybe].

Divine Purpose: In our culture we believe 'Not even an atom can move, without His Intention'. My sleep is bigger than an atom. So interruption of this should be His Intention.
LalithaN
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2019 5:26 pm
Location: Chennai, India

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby LalithaN » Sun Jul 07, 2019 11:44 pm

This Divine Purpose may arise a lot of arguments. The fun is I can argue in both sides simultaneously [One of my interests]. I don't think I want any arguments about this. I just used that term for fun.
LalithaN
Veteran Poster
Veteran Poster
 
Posts: 332
Joined: Tue Mar 26, 2019 5:26 pm
Location: Chennai, India

Re: Procrastination/Fear/Resitance/Support Group Online

Postby mikeisjoyous » Mon Jul 08, 2019 1:08 am

Hi LalithaN, I noticed both yoga and play with kids. I am 73. I can't ask youngsters to let me play. I would be accused by some know-it-all person as either a sexual deviant or kidnapper. I have no criminal record. I think it's just a super-concern for safety of youngsters.

Yoga does not interest me. I have tried Qigong.

I do think sometimes when it's better to act. That is vone reason I am here, LalithaN.

I realized your calling on the Divine in this connection was a joke:)

I am personally an Ayn Rand atheist. The Rand part means I have a definite ethical standard, I am optimistic for the future, and I am an enthusiastic advocate of laissez faire capitalism. It does not mean I agree with all of Ms Rand's pronouncements.
mikeisjoyous
Experienced Poster
Experienced Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2019 12:32 am

PreviousNext

Return to Informal Success Teams

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest