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Getting to know a whole new me...

PostPosted: Wed Jul 16, 2003 12:08 am
by jXL
Dear Barbara, I just wanted to say THANK YOU so much for your amazing works. I bought one of your books from Amazon, then I found Wishcraft on the website. I'm reading it for the second time round, and re-doing the exercises. I am having so much fun doing the exercise "Private-Eye Game" which is so much fun! And it got me in touch with how I used to love creative writing when I was young. How could I have forgotten that? And yet, I did forget, after so many years of living a loveless, lost life, so far away from my dreams - I lost both my health and all that was so dear to me. I've always wanted to write, and to be an author. Now I can - I will get myself a computer, sit myself down and begin a private journey, a road to self discovery. This is such an inspiration! So healing! After losing myself in the corporate world for the past three years, I totally lost bearing and didn't know where to start. I felt like such a big blank, a big mass of blob and to ease all the pain of not knowingness, I kept buying clothes to figure out who I was! To know that all this stuff around me are clues I've left on who I am, is such a relief and an encouragement. Once I get my writing into decent format, I will make a website for them. I just don't know yet how much of myself I am willing to share or keep to myself. But this is just my first draft; I'll end up doing 15 revisions before anyone sees it. =o) Oh, and the Twenty Activities exercise was really helpful too. I realised most of the activities could be done without spending fortunes on them, save dressing well and looking at jewelry. I used to have a such a hard time deciding what "look" I wanted to project - reading about moonlighting, main dish/side dish and so on, I realised Wow, you're so right! I have to be all of them! I do want to live all my five, ten, twenty lives! I can't give up on any of them! Choosing a color and writing about it was immensely fun too. It felt like I could go on forever describing about each distinct color. Why, it felt as if I could write a whole novel about them. They started to feel like people, with real emotions, egos and certain behaviour patterns. Okay, I know you are really busy and may not have time to read all this, but I'll include them here anyway. ---- I am Cherry Red. I am sweet, seductive, succulent, juicy, sensuous, savvy, feisty, with a tinge of mischief and danger, but mostly freshly and fully alive in flesh and blood. I am the life force. I represent vitality. I am unstoppable. I am what you'd call What You See is What You Get. I am a kind that exacts revenge. I am that stage in between - not yet a woman, no more a girl. I am the essence of girlhood. Essence of a kind that men will kill each other for. I am cheerful. I am Cherry Red. I can scream at you and I will feel no shame. I am Charcoal Black. I am warm and secure like a blanket in winter. I am caring and giving like a mother who loves her child. I am sensitive, genuine and have a down-to-earth humour about life. I am practical, mindful and focused. Self-assured and confident. I am consistent and reliable. I am comfortabley professional. I have a deep velvety sensuousness. I am the dame of the domstic world. I am Cool Black. I am from the blue black family. A kind of magical midnight blue is what makes me different from other blacks. I am uncompromising and absolute. I can't stand slow or confused people. I'd rather be a pro and be called a bitch, than to be a warm, loving mother. I am organized and have clear, defined goals. I get things done. People admire me for my successes and achievement. I am the pillar of strength for many people. I am cool, calm, zen. I am the height of sophistication and sleek elegance. I am a Glamourina with capital G. I am foxy, jazzy, a razzle dazzle. I am the diva of the corporate world. ---- Anyhow. My point was to say Thank You! My life has become so enriching and full of purpose! I can get up in the mornings now! Love, jXL