Help me find my wish!

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Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:31 am

I'm not ready to post in wishes & obstacles b/c I don't have my wish yet. Help!!

1. I LOVE: modern homes/interiors/remodeling/residential architecture/real estate
eating delicious food
dancing
& doing these thing with others who are equally excited about them (camaraderie)
(and my secret childhood wish was to be a famous pop singer, but I don't have the voice)

2. I'm a stay at home mom with 4 kids and chronic health issues, so I am not looking for a job.

3. So I guess I need a hobby or two or three that I can do in my spare time.
Eating and dancing are fairly straightforward, although I live in a small town, so I've got limited options.
But, how on earth can I make a hobby out of the house love?

Thanks!
Jessica
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby skannie » Mon Dec 15, 2014 11:52 am

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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby AlexP » Mon Dec 15, 2014 12:03 pm

Skannie'so ideas re: dolls houses are really interesting. Also what bit do you love the most? The styling? Or the furnishings? Colours and textures? Scale of things? Traditional or contemporary? Old or new types of houses? Could you develop a niche as a "specialist" in one particular aspect? ( I know! Saying the word specialist to a creative scanner is a no no). Offer to help people with their mood boards to help them visualise their homes?
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Mon Dec 15, 2014 1:18 pm

Skannie, I really appreciate your suggestion :) , but I'm not into doll houses and I really don't like crafts. :(

Alex, thank you for your reply, too!
Modern for sure, new or remodeled...
I'm not into art; I think that may be why I didn't pursue architecture and especially interior design in college, even though I love looking at others' work with it. I did used to be a real estate assistant, and I really enjoyed helping people find houses that fit their parameters, and I especially liked when I was invited to go along for showings.
I love looking at new or remodeled homes, looking at pictures online of places such as amazing high rise modern condos, looking at floor plans... Those things just feel kind of empty because there's no where to go with it. I get excited looking at them and want to go see, experience, enjoy, share, do...
Style, furnishing, colors, textures, scale??? I guess just style.

Thank you!!
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby skannie » Mon Dec 15, 2014 1:41 pm

You actually do have a wish and obstacle here, Jessica.

Wish: to pursue my interest in modern homes/interiors/remodeling/residential architecture/real estate in my spare time.
Obstacle: I don't know how to make a hobby out of it.

You could start by blogging about it, or having a Pinterest board where you pin interesting stuff.
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby SquarePeg » Mon Dec 15, 2014 3:41 pm

Great idea, skannie! Sometimes "read a lot" is the advice given to folks who want to write. My guess is that "consuming" books, video, etc. on modern homes, interior design, etc. can propel you into a position of discernment, and you could start to give advice to people who are considering buying a home or remodeling an existing one. You might try organizing tours of special places in order to get your fix of camaraderie.
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Riss_ » Tue Dec 16, 2014 8:56 am

Hey there Jessica! Good to see you :D And Skannie and Alex and SquarePeg.

I'm not quite sure about the 'house love' hobby, not sure what level of involvement you're looking at given that you don't want it to be a job but evidently want it to be more than it currently is in your life. Do you think you might like to just offer your 'services' to friends and maybe acquaintances, as something that you love doing and could do together for fun? I have a friend who is great at decorating and although she'd never dream of it as a career (she already has a busy full-time job), she helped a close friend decorate his home when he moved into a dilapidated old cottage and wanted to make it suitable for himself and three children to enjoy. She found it immensely satisfying to help him, and of course he was endlessly grateful. They clipped pictures from magazines and online and tried to imitate different styles that they admired. They were on a low budget so much of the decorating was from thrift stores and they created art for the walls as well.

I'm not terribly talented at decorating but I do love looking at fabrics and home decorating books and I love going through stores selling items for home and garden and kitchen. I've also had to be resourceful and seek creative and innovative ways of making my home feel good, and it's a lot of fun and very satisfying when you can make a real difference to your home through thoughtful but often simple changes. My partner and I have been gradually doing this with our home over the recent months, installing better storage (we were both so messy, and used to get frustrated about it a lot, but once we bought 5 strategically planned shelving units we were never messy again!) and adding a few things like a coat hanging rack, better lighting, a foldup bed that we bought for $25 at a yard sale. It's been great watching the house transform. At the same time, our neighbour on the other side of the street started working on her own home. We had so much fun inspiring each other. She loves it when I go into her home and make suggestions and compliment her on every new thing that she does. Anyway, so my thoughts are that if you'd like to do this kind of thing as a hobby, why not start by letting friends know that you're really into this stuff and would be happy to help them redesign their spaces? You could take pictures and post them to a blog as well. Friends often complain about their messy homes or say that they wish they could have it look like something else - that's always a good opportunity to offer to get together and play. :)

So I don't know if this is along the lines of what would suit you, but if not please feel free to say it's not. I'm sure I can think of some other angles once I have a better idea of what you're seeking. :)
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Tue Dec 16, 2014 9:09 am

I'll have to think about these things. They are maybe not the perfect solution but are getting me thinking which is really helpful!!

So, in general, what does one do if they are really interested and love something they are not good at?

I'm not sure I have any talent even to offer friends for free. I guess I'd like to be a tag along to people either in the related professions or people who are currently using those professional services (realtors, architects, builders, interior designers). But I do live in a small town (not as many options) and I'm shy. So I don't happen to know any of these professionals, and I'm not sure I could be comfortable asking them much less actually tagging along if they said yes.

I do feel comfortable asking my friends who may soon be in need of these services, but in general my friends are super busy and reserve that sort of time for their families. I think they would say yes, but then when it was time, it wouldn't work out for me to join them.

I need to meet some new people! My friends are all married with children. I haven't had many, but I have thoroughly enjoyed having a couple friends in the past who are single and/or don't have children. They are so much more free!
Maybe I could meet people online and/or in other cities? Then we could just share ideas through things like Pinterest? I'd like more than just Pinterest, but it's a start...

Thank you all!!! :D
Jessica
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Tue Dec 16, 2014 9:23 am

Are any of you interested in reading one of Barbara's books and doing the exercises together? I think there are "book groups" for that, but I don't know how to get in one.

I think I'm going to drop out of Hanging Out. Are you all currently in it? Or have been in the past? Any advice on that?
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Riss_ » Tue Dec 16, 2014 10:58 am

Jessica wrote:Are any of you interested in reading one of Barbara's books and doing the exercises together? I think there are "book groups" for that, but I don't know how to get in one.

I think I'm going to drop out of Hanging Out. Are you all currently in it? Or have been in the past? Any advice on that?


Well, I only just joined last month. It sounds like we didn't get a normal experience of what it's like, because Barbara and Patty hardly came in over the last two weeks due to an issue with their ISP - they weren't getting any notifications of our comments. Barbara has been in there a lot since realising this a few days ago, and she's been dealing with a lot of people who apparently felt ignored. So I think we'll have more support and input from her as time goes on. (By the way, here's the link where she explained it all - http://barbarasclub.com/hangingout/comm ... ent-196828 ). I renewed my membership and plan to stay on for the year. If you're not sure, why not go month-by-month, assuming that's okay with your budget? For me personally, I decided to stay because I feel inspired by so many of the people's stories and lives, and it's a pretty uplifting experience for me, to have so many of us there all wanting to offer support and encouragement to each other. I don't like the way all the comments are so jumbled and hard to find or keep track of, but I can live with that.

I love the idea of going through one of her books and doing the exercises, but I just don't know how much time I'd have to commit to it right now, with all the other things I'm involved in. If you got a group started I'd be happy to stick my head in whenever I had the opportunity. I'm sure you could get into one of the official groups - easy way to find out about it is to post on Hanging Out or email Patty or Barbara. Otherwise keep asking here and you might get some good interest.
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Riss_ » Thu Dec 18, 2014 11:57 am

How's it going Jessica? I was just looking back through our posts and thought I'd offer my thoughts on one of your questions:

So, in general, what does one do if they are really interested and love something they are not good at?


Start somewhere, anywhere! :D I used to be the person who was least likely to ever be able to draw. All my life I could only do stick figures and smilie faces. When I was 20 I took an 8-week class called 'Everyone Can Draw'. I was amazed to discover that there were basic principles that even someone who 'couldn't draw', like me, could learn. I'd always assumed artistic talent was just something you had or you didn't have, and that I didn't. This class taught me the basics and although I was still very slow at it, I realised I could indeed draw. Later in my 30s I found time to start practicing a little more seriously, and I bought an easel and a ream of big paper and started drawing pictures that I loved out of magazines and books. I used the principles I'd learned in that class when I was 20, and with every drawing I made, I learned a little more about how I could improve, or what areas I needed to focus on. After a couple of years I got to the point where I could show my favourite sketches to friends and they would ooh and aah over how nice they were. And of course, the library was my best friend! I borrowed armloads of books on drawing and painting and art.

I think books are a fantastic place to start. If you love something you're not good at, get some books on it. Watch the home decorating TV shows. Or join classes if you can find one and they are affordable for you. There are often good online classes too, which are often inexpensive and can be done at home if it's easier for you with the children. And then, start doing the things that you love, in small ways to begin with, and watch your confidence and skill start to grow. I really enjoy home decorating too, although as I've said I'm not that good at it. But I have built up a decent store of ideas and tips based on all the gazillions of books I've borrowed from the library, lol! There are so many great ones on how to makeover a room, how to create attractive and effective storage, how to make fun bedrooms for kids, how to make great use of small spaces (which is useful stuff to know even in large homes!). You start playing around with these ideas in your own homes, and then people comment and it makes you feel so good. Or you go into someone else's home and they're complaining about not knowing what to do with some ugly or difficult part of their house, and you say, 'Hey I just saw this in a magazine, would you consider doing this thing?'

Being shy makes it a little harder but the more you can start to interact with others and tell them about your passions and interests, the more opportunities you have to get involved. Maybe this would be a nice way to challenge your shyness and start opening up more! If I were you I wouldn't be afraid of anybody. If you have 4 kids that makes you a superhero in my book. :D That's an enormous responsibility and something I respect very much.
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Tue Dec 30, 2014 7:22 pm

Hi,
Just wanted to let you know I appreciated your response, and I intend to reply too! I got swamped by the holidays!
Jessica
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Jessica » Thu Jan 01, 2015 7:18 am

I made some notes from the replies here! :D
Suggestions include: Blog about it, have a Pinterest board (I do), read/study/learn, organize tours, offer to help friends, shopping, take a class.
So this is helping me to come up with more specific ways I can apply these suggestions.
I also finally figured out they have full episodes from HGTV online; that is super because we don't have that channel on tv. :)

Who/how should I ask in order to meet people who are also interested in homes? I tried online, but I only ran into professional groups (where you have to be a professional).

Happy new year!!
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Elaine Glimme » Thu Jan 01, 2015 6:44 pm

Some thoughts.

Jessica, you said that you're not sure what your wish is. What about visiting open houses and window shopping? Perhaps with a good friend or two. the idea is that inspiration might fall on your head while you're out and about. (or it might not, but it sounds like a fun way to spend an afternoon.) I am thinking of the movie "Back to the Future" where the professor hit his head on the toilet and got the inspiration to invent the trans-flow capassitor. (or something like that.)

Concerning HO. I like HO, but I haven't posted very much lately. Sometimes the topics really hit me (as in the example above) and I write a lot. Sometimes, they're just for someone else. Also computers beshmuters as someone once said. I routinely have computer trouble and I'm sidelined in cyberspace until it can get to Staples and Spencer fixes whatever I've messed up. And I know I'm in a different part of the loop from where you are. I'm on year three. I was going to try to find a place where people are posting and go to those messages instead of the ones that my e-mail directs me to.

Yes, to what Riss said about drawing. Betty Friedman wrote a book about drawing, and it's true - anyone can draw.

One thing about any hobby. We all want to produce something wonderful and beautiful and terrific. We probably won't on our first or second or third or ... etc try. There's this process called learning. It's frustrating because most of us want to be good right now. And most of us will be bad at something before we are good at it.
There's an HO post somewhere - I can't remember if it's an audio, video, or written post. Anyway, it's called "Why don't you finish anything?" I think the answer, for me anyway, is that when I get close to finishing a project, I get to the point where I judge it, and if it's not up to my standards, I get frustrated. I tend to stay with a project until I mess up royally, and at that point I lose interest.

Anyway, good luck, Jessica, and "hi," everyone else.
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Re: Help me find my wish!

Postby Elaine Glimme » Thu Jan 01, 2015 6:58 pm

Also, concerning wishes and obstacles. They don't have to be a lifelong path. They can be something that you try for right now, and maybe you'll stay with that wish for a while and maybe you won't. It's just fine to change your mind. I think sometimes we put to much importance on finding the right wish and end up not doing anything.
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