Scared or Lazy?

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Scared or Lazy?

Postby elizagard » Sat Jul 22, 2006 1:27 pm

I think of myself as a scanner but my main hobby recently has been to watch travel shows, Nova, and Friends. Now, I am taking both a more or less beginning Spanish and an advanced French grammar review. I keep thinking I'd like to pull out my watercolors or teach myself to draw but I don't. I took a piano class earlier this year but have done nothing since. I have tons of cookbooks but have been eating out a lot. I like to hike but haven't been since a couple dozen ticks hitched a ride not on my dog but me! Did I mention my mother has Lyme disease that won't go away? And, oh I've been meaning to learn to kayak or sail for several past summers. Basically, I come home, walk my dog, and then crash on the couch on the nights I don't have a class.
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Postby Reset » Sat Jul 22, 2006 1:45 pm

Hey, Eliza; does your job drain you from a lot of energy? It's just a wild shot but I recall long periods of time in which I was simply to worn out by "swimming against the stream" all (work)day, that I simply don't want/ed to go in/to my own water after work. I don't know how to re-energize on or after the job efficiently. But maybe that's a hint that can lift away some of the guilty ("lazy") feeling? just my 2 cents, /me
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Postby Tituba » Sat Jul 22, 2006 2:00 pm

I don't think you are scared or lazy. Maybe you need the structure of a classroom to do those things. Some people are self-motivated, others need structure and accountability. Why not sign up for a watercolor class at your local adult/community ed?
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Postby guinnessue » Sat Jul 22, 2006 3:04 pm

Are you depressed? Depression can make it difficult to do things, or to do the things you normally enjoy.
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Postby docsue » Sat Jul 22, 2006 5:49 pm

Are you realy lazy? By whose standards? Or is that a story you're telling yourself? Certainly check to be sure there isn't some physical cause - depression, thyroid problem, dietary imbalance. Are you simply bored and percolating a new project? (All those travel shows!) Sometimes stuck really means consolodating before a growth spurt. Sometimes it's good to ask the hard question - what's in it for me to NOT do anything? Then ask yourself if the story you're telling yourself is true or not. I had a client who told herself she couldn't possibly finish her novel because she's only get lazy and sit home eating bon bons. It turned out that she'd won major prizes for her poetry without a single lazy moment - it was her parents who had become lazy, not her. Once she realized that she'd adopted someone else's story, she was able to move on. And, without sounding like an armchair therapist, I wonder just a bit if the effects of Lyme disease on your mother aren't somehow an issue for you?
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Postby Tricia56 » Sat Jul 22, 2006 6:39 pm

I like structure too. Maybe you can write you activities on a calender or have an "accountability partner" to make sure you do the things you love.
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Postby DStaub11 » Sun Jul 23, 2006 1:42 am

Accountability partner is the best!! I've been in this state, and I got out of it. Not that I don't veg on the couch a certain amount, but I spend regular time on my creative projects, which was almost impossible a few years ago. One thing that really helped was that my sister and I each made a weekly goal. It could be large or tiny (there were a couple of weeks when I was so stuck that my entire goal was "look at my drawing once"). If at the end of the week we both met our goal, we put $5.00 in the pot. When we got to $40.00, we gave each other a gift certificate. We did this for almost two years! It really helped--I think because we were both having trouble taking time just for ourselves, so if we were accountable to our sister we felt as if we needed to do it... I also like what Barbara says, I think in Live the Life You Love--that you just have to smell the apple pie on the other side of the lake and you remember how much you love it, enough to jump in the water. Do Mi
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Postby Britta » Mon Jul 24, 2006 5:17 am

Hi Eliza, I have two comments: one is concerning the issue of "not doing enough". This seems very familiar to me, but my friends keep telling me I do so much even if I think I don't. So two extra classes in the evenings probably including homework does not sound like so little to me. the second ins concerning " not watching TV so much" or similar. Find out what you want to do instead of trying to get away from the coach and TV and focus on that. Like I want to do watercolor drawings. Then maybe if another class is just too much, you could for the time being chose a smaller goal, like plying around with watercolors a little (like 5 or 10 Min's) every day. I begin to find that useful as normally I don't want to start either if I can't do it full speed. Another idea would be put it in your calendar for September or another later month and make sure you that's when you will have the time. Hope this helps Britta
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 7:45 am

First, I'd like to thank everyone for all the great replies. I'd also like to apologize for taking so long to reply. I've read and thought about your suggestions the last few days, but my main goal has been keeping cool. One good thing about the heat is that it's gotten me up and out of my house and over to the beaches and parks in San Francisco.
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:12 am

does your job drain you from a lot of energy?
Hi Reset, I hadn't thought about it before, but it's an interesting idea. I do find myself nodding off in meetings sometimes. Those are not stressful but often very boring as much of it doesn't apply to me. I've only been there for about 8 months and the work is generally fairly interesting except for some of the meetings. My last job lasted 10 years. Towards the end, I frequently requested a change in assignment just so I wouldn't be bored out of my mind. I did have a very swanky office on a nice atrium though. I do have some ambivalence about the job, but that perhaps has to do with a few of the people. It's nothing overt really and not even all the time, but a couple are at times a bit snippy when they are under stress. I know a few people at Google and that seems like a lot more fun. I'm going to monitor my energy more closely to see if what happens at work is affecting how I feel.
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:28 am

"Maybe you need the structure of a classroom to do those things. Some people are self-motivated, others need structure and accountability." Hi Tituba, This is true for me. I do need structure especially for things I'm not yet good at. The only time I have produced any art has been either in a class or when there have been an artist around to help me with a technique or two. I'm a Sybil, so really like the idea of the school day, but I haven't figured out how to do art on my kitchen table for an hour or so. Drawing might be easier as it wouldn't require as much space or cleanup. I try to limit myself to two classes at a time as otherwise it can seem overwhelming. However, it might depend some on how much time is required outside the classroom. My Spanish class just ended so perhaps I can fit another one in. The problem is that it's hard to limit myself to only two. I think I'll continue with the Spanish in the fall mostly because it's a great group of people. But then there is also ice skating, French, Italian, Greek (which I will have to do on my own), kayaking, piano, drawing, and sailing.
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:32 am

guinnessue wrote:Are you depressed? Depression can make it difficult to do things, or to do the things you normally enjoy.
Hi Guinnessue, No, I don't think so. I get bummed out every once in a while especially if something bad happens or if I've made a mistake. However, I usually rebound within a day or two. Elizabeth
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:52 am

docsue wrote: Certainly check to be sure there isn't some physical cause - depression, thyroid problem, dietary imbalance.
I've had my thyroid checked, but as both my mother and sister have problems, it might be worthwhile to to take the tests again. I had a problem with anemia a few years ago, so it would be good to check my levels again. I'm making a new effort to be better at avoiding all sugar as it does make me tired.
Are you simply bored and percolating a new project? (All those travel shows!)
I am planning a trip to Greece, and possibly London, Paris, Barcelona, Venice, and Istanbul. Yes, all of them. I don't think I'm bored, although a coworker once said that I had the lowest tolerance for boredom of anyone she's ever seen. I just think that so much tv isn't the best use of my time, and I should spend more time on things that are productive.
I wonder just a bit if the effects of Lyme disease on your mother aren't somehow an issue for you?
It is, of course, a concern. However, I'm fairly good at dealing with it most of the time although it took a while to learn how to do that. There are times that are more difficult than others.
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Postby elizagard » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:55 am

DStaub11 wrote:Accountability partner is the best!! I've been in this state, and I got out of it. Not that I don't veg on the couch a certain amount, but I spend regular time on my creative projects, which was almost impossible a few years ago.
Hi Do Mi, I like the idea, but I'm not sure who I'd do it with. I'll have to ponder that. Elizabeth
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Postby Jezicka » Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:56 am

Eliza-- I don' think you're either scared or lazy. It's funny reading this thread-- it's clear we're all scanners here! :lol: Only a scanner would think she was doing too wa-a-y little by holding down a full-time job and only taking a couple of classes on the side! And only another scanner would think that this 'lack of energy' could be a sign of depression! I have this feeling a lot myself-- day to day I think, \"I haven't been anywhere in months, all I do is work, I haven't written anything or started that dancercise class I was thinking about, or taken that wild edible plants class... I'm not getting anything done-- I'm in a funk!\" But looking back over the last year I see: a certificate in desktop publishing, a trip to Sedona, the Grand Canyon, Flagstaff and the Indian Reservations, a first draft of a novel mostly complete, a couple of web pages done, two public access television classes taken and bunch of volunteer camerawork done... I think it's an 'occupational' hazard for scanners. However much we do it's just a drop in the bucket compared to all the things that excite us and that we'd like to do!
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