Rewards

What should you do when you want to do everything? If you're fascinated by everything, and you've been called dabbler, dilettante, undisciplined, indecisive etc., this forum is for you.

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Rewards

Postby butterflykiss » Mon Jun 28, 2010 10:51 am

Hi to all you creative scanners.
I have a question about rewards. I am in doubt what my attraction to activities is and also my reward.
This is some of my interests:
Water painting (have been doing 4 years ago a lot but stopped) like to paint again and sell it
Design and make my own clothes (the same as above)
Make jewellery (just started on this one) and sell it
Make projects with people who need extra care
Read a lot of books about personal development - to find a solution to some problem/something I am not so happy about, a feeling etc. AND help others
Write a novel (dream - never done that)
Make a magazine about Italy (dream - never done that) and sell it
Make workshops for small places for people with psycological problems - my own small business
Network for young who are lonely (never started) to meet in real life
Make plans for everything
Be in the nature - walk, run and biking
Make groups of people - different purposes - card club - food club etc. (done some of these) love to be with people


well, there are naturally a lot of other things.
What could be my reward? The thing I get my energy from?
Any suggestions.
THANKS for any reply - and have a lovely sunny day. 8)
Butterflykiss
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Re: Rewards

Postby Andreya » Mon Jun 28, 2010 1:25 pm

Hi Butterfly!

Nice to see you here.

These are A LOT of things (and I know, I'm similar! :))
Just curious, how is your current financial situation? Is this all purely for fun or do you need money as soon as possible - or is that not really such a question right now?
I'm asking because, as idealistic scanners we may get unrealistic expectations of ourselves and/or other people, that money isn't important, we may have a tendency to put our interests first, and the world as it is may see the money thing important too. And if you don't have that covered, you may get burntout or resentful, and this may decrease energy and will to do things etc.

So let me just comment a few of those: I grouped them together, according to themes I see emerging.

ARTS/CRAFTS - SELF EXPRESSION & CREATIVITY
Water painting (have been doing 4 years ago a lot but stopped) like to paint again and sell it - do you have a studio/place where you can do this? What made you stop? - I stopped painting cause didn't have separate space needed.
Design and make my own clothes (the same as above) - Today clothes are so cheap it takes a lot of mental will to make your own despite it all!I admire you for making your own in the 1st place! I want to learn too, this has kept getting sidetracked somehow, I guess I have too full closets anyway!
Make jewellery (just started on this one) and sell it - probably less space needed, do you have know-how, experience and materials etc?

Write a novel (dream - never done that) - may take a while, or you could try the 3-weeks challenge? might want to read a bit about structure etc first? (it took longer than expected for me though, many writers write one novel a year, some even write longer - do you have uninterrupted time and structure to write? If you go the regular publishing house it can take long, even a few years, if you need money more short term, other things might be better?)
Make a magazine about Italy (dream - never done that) and sell it - again, it may take quite some time to develop it, if you don't have the know-how and experience, connections, possibly mentors or such..

For me, self-expresssion is about taking my feelings and making them into something funny and/or beautiful. Also, establishing individuality and creating things of beauty. Basically I can make myself feel good via self-expression.. as if transferring all those feelings and thoughts on paper, it's a sort of therapy/healing, and a lot of fun, often.
And then it's good sharing it with others - to inform, educate, inspire.. Lots of other rewards too..

WORK WITH PEOPLE, FOR PEOPLE, BE WITH PEOPLE (the above partly fall under this too, it seems..)
CONNECTING PEOPLE, SOLVE PROBLEMS for self and others, make others feel good and oneself too :)
Maybe you are a natural connector, who loves it to have other people around having fun, connecting?

Make projects with people who need extra care - volunteering (with a non-profit or just 'on your own') or would you like to get paid for that too?
Make workshops for small places for people with psycological problems - my own small business - interesting - might take a while to fully develop it, or do you have the basics covered already?
Network for young who are lonely (never started) to meet in real life - this could perhaps connect with some of the above and below, see if you can link any things together.. Do you want to do this 'for free' or as part of profit centers/as a living?
Make groups of people - different purposes - card club - food club etc. (done some of these) love to be with people - you could possibly do this as a reward too: eg if you finish XY can go to food club meeting or meet up with friends, if not, stay home-?
Read a lot of books about personal development - to find a solution to some problem/something I am not so happy about, a feeling etc. AND help others -

Make plans for everything - might use this as reward too..
Be in the nature - walk, run and biking: easiest to use as reward and incentive, methinks. If you start the day by running/biking, u'll have most energy for the day too..

These are just some thoughts.. Not sure if I understood you right, first I thought you are looking for rewards to motivate yourself with, then thought you were trying to figure out your natural inner motivation, or is it both?
Maybe you can also write down what you love most about each of these things, what is the 'indispensible' element (what would you do even without money, when would you do it and when not...)
You know best what you get energy from - and when not (what is lacking)?

Wishing you lots of happy moments with your projects!
'Everything is possible. They make rockets and put them on the moon, you know!' (neighbour, on closing up a balcony)
Andreya
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Re: Rewards

Postby butterflykiss » Tue Jun 29, 2010 1:41 pm

Dear Andreya.
Thank you so much for your reply - I am so happy for all the things that you write - your suggestions and reflections - they are very good.
To your question about profession and money I can tell you that I have a job - 25 hours a week which gives me enough money to live, so
this is not a problem. I have then about 2-4 hours every day to do something else.
I have a place now to paint as well as to make other things. I can't remember why I stopped, my divorce perhaps - yes, I think that was why.
Do you paint now?
As to making jewelleries - I have some materials - I have started to make earrings - but it is like I miss a purpose or a plan. In a year I will have 1000 pair of
earrings for myself - and I do not need that. The same maby is the case with the water painting - I paint and paint and have a lot of paitings - for what? You see? I need to use it - not to be famous or rich, just to have a purpose.
The novel and the magazine - I know that it would/will take time, effort and maby some courses. You know as I wrote above - I have 2-4 hours a day appr. - and I am stucked now - not doing any of the things I have mentioned.
You write about selfexpression - what are you doing now, how has your "way" and struggles been? I am curious about that.
Very interesting what you write about being a connector. Never thought of that. I have been working with mentally ill grown ups for 10 years, so I have a background and experiences in order to make some workshops etc. This about people is important, I can feel.
I asked about rewards mostly the part about me trying to figure out my natural inner motivation. I am reading Barbara Sher's book about scanners and I want very much to say what my motivation is - you know as the bee and the flower. You have mentioned creativity - I have like 3 directions: New things: 1)Projects, people, experiences 2) create things 3)plan things.
I do not know why it feels so important for me to know what drives me.
If you have time and feel like it - I would very much like to hear something about what you have done.
Just for your information - I am not american= Explains mistakes if any.
Thanks again for your time and your reply - I can really use it.
Love butterfly kiss
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Re: Rewards

Postby Andreya » Thu Jul 01, 2010 9:17 am

Dear Butterflykiss,

Glad to be of help! Your post gave me food for thought too, and I got the idea to try to organize my interests better too! (into short-term or long-term doable etc)

It is good that you have the financial aspect covered! (I am still working on that!)

As for the earrings and paintings, could you maybe sell them on eBay or something like that? (We don't have eBay Slovenia, there is a similar site.) Or on art market/s? (We have one in the capitol in the summer.) Or in any small shops or on stalls in touristy areas? Do you know any artists from Denmark, where do they sell their arts and crafts?

I don't paint now: obstacle - lack of proper space just for this and also, would need to do something with the paintings not just leave them lie around.. And perhaps some not-so-wonderful memories too.. And haven't managed to research and find truly eco (environmentally friendly) paints and other materials yet! Besides, I was doing other things.. :)

It may be true that a trauma like divorce can make you stop doing certain things. They may be connected with memories that are now painful etc. There was a film about a girl who stopped dancing when her mom died, etc. (She connected that with the bad news, subconsciously.)

As for me, I have A LOT of beginnings, haven't really taken most of them to finishing stage yet (a few novels in the writing, a whole bunch of short stories begun and only a few finished, a lot of songs written and mostly not yet recorded proper...) It is a process.. (At least I have some songs finished now, before I had mostly beginnings of songs too :)) I managed to write some articles too (shorter than novels and short stories :)) Blogging is even easier (or forum posting, which is even easier :)) I have been involved in some eco projects recently, mostly non-profit as of yet, was learning about beekeeping, been distracted with home renovations, gardening (okay, learning to garden, somewhat!), trying to be more self-sufficientish, and re-focused on making some more money again and on one of the novels. Not sure what else I'll do in the summer, because it is so hot here!! So more will be done in the autumn/winter/spring I guess.. (I hope!) It's not easy when you try to learn and do so many things at once.. (And spring/autumn when it's best to do anything in my attic home office, is usually the time with most work outside the house.. Ideally I'd get separate spaces for creating stuff, hopefully in the future..)

MY struggles were mostly with my parents (who wanted me to do any artsy things as a 'hobby' - at a time when this was like a dirty word to me lol), and with myself and time/overwhelm management, with finding uninterrupted time and space to create or sticking to my schedule/s and plans... If you work in a home office other people may not see that as 'work', and may just interrupt or call you to other things which are their priorities.. One time I was translating something and Dad started the power tools on the balcony! ('This shouldn't bother you,' he said. OoO As a factory worker most of his life he had no concept for 'intellectual work' needing peace and concentration to focus..)
When I was working full time I was often too exhausted to create.. So I'm a bit reluctant to go back to that.. (A friend said something similar, though some people online manage to write novels when working full time easily. I did have some great ideas for short stories sometimes then. Probably also depends on the job and family/support. I heard some people even have to get at least a part-time job to get some structure into their lives and be able to write/create more easily..) It's not so easy to start own biz or non-profit either.. So, these are some of the things I've struggled with.. Mostly how to make the financial side of things work.. And time/inspiration management..

I use writing fiction as sort of therapy - I give all my problems to the characters and exaggerate hugely so I can start laughing about them! lol! (I also want to inspire, educate and inform people with my art and writing, with articles too. And ideally make them laugh or cheer them up, make them feel good. :))

I would love to learn sewing too, mostly haven't really done much of that yet: I did find a cool site the other day threadbanger.com - they will have video tutorials which look fun! Motivation: to fix some cool retro clothes I got, and to be more self sufficientish and to create unique stuff I like.. (I'd also love to learn to make shoes, or at least slippers! That would be more eco and would fit my somewhat unique feet! :)) I even wouldn't mind learning to make glasses, as I find a good frame with difficulty these days.. (My nose is sort of uniquely beautiful too, ha ha!)
Unfortunately I can't wear earrings, though I'd love to! (I'm allergic, Sis is too.)

What draws you the most? Can you just start doing a little bit every day? (Or maybe one or two or three things a few times a week, like something on Wednesdays, another thing on Fridays...? You will find that for some things, just doing them once may be okay - for others, you may want to do them more often - at least I can be that way..)

I'm not American either, your English is good!!
'Everything is possible. They make rockets and put them on the moon, you know!' (neighbour, on closing up a balcony)
Andreya
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Re: Rewards

Postby butterflykiss » Tue Jul 06, 2010 7:35 am

Dear Andreya.
Thank you very much again for your sharing about what you are interested in, how you have done it, and I understand your struggles very well - naturally :P
I was thinking the same when you wrote to me "why don't you start small". I am beginning to understand it. What about you and all your songs, and lyrics and so on. If you could find someone - for instance some people who is in a start-up fase and they need some good songs, not popular ones - you could see then on the internet.. I think it is possible. I know it takes practice, but for me it is also a matter of having fun. It is a very heavy load when I think that I have to spent too much time scheduled during the week. If you understand. I need alså "FREE TIME" where nothing is scheduled, where I can read good books, go for a walk and just relex. No demands, perhaps. So it is a balance between getting the projects started and going and then have the time free to other good things. Your suggestions to divide the time - few hours/days sounds good to me. Thanks for that.
I live in Denmark, so we are not THAT far from each other :o
I have holiday for 3 weeks Friday 8. juli and will not be on the Internet, but I will be back in August for more good talk and suggestions.
Thanks again, Andreya - very inspirering.
Butterflykiss
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