I don't fit into this society

What should you do when you want to do everything? If you're fascinated by everything, and you've been called dabbler, dilettante, undisciplined, indecisive etc., this forum is for you.

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Re: I don't fit into this society

Postby Annalena » Sat Jul 09, 2011 1:12 am

Well, all your stories kinda prove my point, there ARE things you just "don't do" but that's for a good reason. You don't wash your underwear in a frying pan cause it's GROSS!!!

You don't go and eat other people's stuff cause it's theirs, and so on... but then there are these things that just do not have a reason like the whole drying the plates thing.


Yesterday I talked to my sister's boyfriend who asked me what I wanted to do after I finished school. I told him I didn't know and never will know THE one thing, then tried to explain to him what a scanner was. His responss were "but you have to find one thing!", "You have to delete things from the list", "You can't do everything!", "Whats the one thing you REALLY want to do?"

When I explained to him my happiness does not only lie in career (or not mainly) , I want to be happy and find inner peace , travel, be healthy and not only long for material belongings (as unbelievably hippie-ish as that sounds coming from a business student) he did not quite get it, either. Of course I am a person who also defines herself by work and likes working, but that's not the center of it all!! Then I told I'd rather not work for my whole life in one place but make enough money so I do NOT have to work any more. CAN and probably will but do not HAVE to! And I believe that is possible! With good ideas, good spending habits and my boyfriend's stock market skills. He did not quite get it. Thinking outside the box seems to be quite hard...

God am I thankful that I have a seriously inspiring boyfriend who tells me that I can do anything just maybe not everything at once, but everything I want eventually and who just wants to help me getting structured and organized to get more of the things done I aim to do. And who shares my goals, most of them.

A good thing I heard recently- "We're generation CV, but I don't live for my CV, I live for me..."
~~ thinking helps. ~~
Annalena
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Re: I don't fit into this society

Postby ctownjak » Mon Sep 19, 2011 6:37 pm

Hello Annalena,

"I just have the wrong friends. "

Your friends are okay, but they will not be business partners. Most people are afraid of change, afraid of taking chances, and would not know how to do something different even if they wanted to.

"it's really only socially acceptable to finish school, start looking for a job, complain about not getting a job for a considerate amount of time, finally get a job (not too well paid though), work in that job, for guys: work in that or another job you constantly complain about until you retire, for women: stop working for 2-3 years after each child and then work part time, for both: complain until you retire, until you start "the real" life, once you're retired complain about how boring your life is. "

I have done many things professionally, and have been in many environments. You just described almost everyone I have ever worked with. I am in the midwest United States.

"Maybe this is just a German problem (after all, we're great at complaning!)"

Many people at work complain about work, and many of them play the lottery perpetually. This is reality, not just in your environment.

" I have so many ideas. I want to write a book (or more). I want to create a start up. I want to be a tv travel journalist. I want to work for a news agency. I want to be a photographer. And so on. (As stated in some posts before).

You and I could be twins.

"Guess they dont take me serious anymore about my ideas."

I cannot even talk about my ideas and ventures at family gatherings. I get completely ignored, everyone just moves onto different subjects. And those are the people that love me!

You are twenty-seven years old - Let me tell you time is everything, and you have plenty of time to do everything.

You want a startup? No problem, take the steps to create it. I did it with some co-workers. We have not had revenue in our first three years, but everything is setup for when we DO start getting revenue. So, create a company name. Register the company name. Hire a designer friend to create a logo with you. Create a web site. Get business cards through the cheapest online solution. Now that was easy right?

You need partners. Think about the skills that you have. You need partners who have the other skills. Perhaps a programmer to create your web site or a software product that you envisioned. Perhaps a designer to do all of the design work for your products. Perhaps an engineer to turn your idea into a viable design. Do not be afraid to give away a hefty portion of your idea / product, or take partners into your company. The rules: You must trust the partners implicitly and they must work. Even though you will all be working part time on the project, everyone must show dedication. It took me a few years of working with my side partners to understand that they would save my life, and they were darn good at what they did.

You mentioned photography. Especially in my twenties, I picked up my camera and went places. I went to the park and shot everything I saw. I went to clubs, took photos of the bands, then gave them prints for free of ones they liked. I made lots of friends this way. Establish your own artistic vision in your own personal photo album. Maybe later on your photos and experience will contribute to success of your company, maybe it will always just be a fun thing you do on the side. Don't WORRY about it. Take photos and have fun. The experiences will reward you greatly.

I am writing a book. I can tell you this: If you sit down to write for the sole purpose of writing a book, you will never come up with anything. I play guitar and I wrote out many exercises to help myself. After a while I had this large collection of exercises and thought that I should publish it for others. So, think about something you know really well, and put your expertise down on paper. You may be young enough that you do not have anything yet. If so, don't force it. Just keep it in the back of your mind, when you have the knowledge, you can easily write it down and self-publish it on the Internet. Then, you can pay a couple hundred bucks for stock art, $125 for an ISBN number, and you're ready to go.

All of these things involve simple, tangible steps that you should start taking now. Go ahead and get that regular job. You will need money for all of your endeavors. Do your job well but do not worry that you will be stuck there forever. In a short amount of time you will be able to get out on your own. Trust me.

Jak
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Re: I don't fit into this society

Postby niki » Fri Jun 29, 2012 2:58 am

@Annalena : it's eerie when reading and knowing that another person from another far country could be like my twin sister, having literally almost the same thoughts and perspectives about this life and society!

You are not alone :)

~warm regards from Indonesia~
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Re: I don't fit into this society

Postby Annalena » Sat Oct 13, 2012 7:22 am

Jay,

this is really late, but thank you for the awesome advice.

"Get a regular job and soon you'll be ready to get out on your own" is exactly the way I picked for myself for now.
In the long run, there really is no alternative to founding my own business, preferably my own empire of businesses... ;)

Having that job now forces me to give up my usual part time jobs to a degree, but maybe that is just what I needed to happen in order to move on.
~~ thinking helps. ~~
Annalena
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