150 Steps In September

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Jane B
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hanging in there!

Post by Jane B »

Hello all, My "goals of the month" have been put on hold the past few days as I have to focus on the crisis at my apartment. Today an exterminator came to the apartment to treat for bedbugs. The past few days have been spent doing the many things that are required in preparation for the treatment: wash all your clothes in hot water and dry them on hot (and of course I have a lot of delicates so I also paid a fortune in dry cleaning), bag everything in big garbage bags and seal them with tape, vacuum everywhere, the couch, mattresses and aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall the cracks in the floor (we have old wood floors with massive cracks which is where those pesky bedbugs are probably hiding. oh and the vaccum cleaner broke down halfway through the job). And besides we find out at the last minute that we need to board our cats for one month after the treatment. So we have to scramble at the last minute to find friends who are willing to look after our pets for one month, with only a few days' notice. Oh and the plumber called to say he was coming the same day to fix our ceiling that has been leaking for weeks, and this was the only day he could come because after that he is in the hospital. In the midst of all this "excitement" I have to try and look after the most important aspects of my work and music (i.e. needed-it-yesterday translations, preparation and promotion for our show on Monday, rehearsals)... Ya know when it seems like everything at once? Sorry for the drama, I've been running on low sleep and I needed to vent.

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by An8el »

Ouch, feeling for the chaos in your immediate living spaces! I believe that you can make your landlord responsible for what you are being charged to board your animals. Probably depends on the state you are in, but in most states when "repairs" or "maintenance" - and I'm sure the health dept. would be a source for this information - are being done on your apt. you deserve to be reimbursed both for the time you cannot use your apt. or some of it's features and be provided with a place for your property to go if it must be moved = and pets qualify as "property." As for me, I really can't believe that getting this billing done has incited so much resistance in me. But I waded through it, finally by just nipping at it, step by step. Telling myself that I can't let another day go by without do something about the next step. Telling myself that all I really had to do was just start - no coercion for how long I had to keep working, just start, start, start. Finally, it worked, as steps do work. Mailed it all off today. Now if the rest of what I've got in place will work the way it's supposed to, all will be well. I'm $60. short of my minimum goal, but I think that I can make it if I sell a couple of things at my friend's garage sale this Saturday. We'll see if I can get them ready to sell some time tomorrow or Friday. If people can pay what they owe from the billing I've just sent out, (of course there is no guarantee about that one!) I'll be able to pay for a few other outstanding bills. Man - nobody is spending any money on what they don't HAVE to buy. I really don't have it, but I'm glad I have the things I did get that provide for my living on pretty much nothing.

spiegel
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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by spiegel »

31. Ballet class tonight - stress relief after a frantic day (and tomorrow promises to be more of the same, only without the receptionist...guess who ends up playing backup receptionist?)

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steps today

Post by Lynx »

Hey supports, I'm noticing how much we're dealing with the pesky details of living—bedbugs, decluttering, bills to send, bills to pay, etc. For me, a lot of this gets in the way of my true goals whenever I can clear the stack on top of them to see them. For example: Today, made several calls to my reps asking them NOT to go along with this bogus bail-out deal. Aren't there any economist or accountants or even bookkeepers in government? I'm dealing with paper work for a list of contractors I just got approved for. More paperwork to follow on Friday. No pay, just paperwork. Its the craziest system. Early next week I hear back on the latest proposal I submitted. if it's not going (I don't get any interviews) I'll have to see what alternatives exists for income. I'm a facilitator for two families with a with an adult member with disabilities. Its part of something called LifeSPAN which is modeled on a project in Canada called PLAN. The idea is that LifeSPAN creates a community around the focus person (person with disability) that will be sturdy and deal with any acute crises and carry on with the focus person past the death of the parental or sibling caregivers. This one family and I just don't seem to get our communication to jibe. Now the person with the disability has had a conversation with my supervisor. My supervisor wants to meet with me and her to talk about this. I said I'd rather have the three of us and her parents meet because I don't want to start a game of telephone AND its already crazily triangulated and I don't want to make matters worse. It's a minor gig, I do it more for the heart of it than the cash. I will ask the I Ching today if it's time for me to resign and let them reset with a new person. I have a library book to renew, three to return, some library research on the health care system, a Reiki session and a talk on the use of the I Ching to structure 64 songs and art installations around the area. Today is brought to me by the word crazy. Lynx
Last edited by Lynx on Sat Sep 27, 2008 6:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel

Jane B
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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by Jane B »

Hello all, Thanks for the support. Today I'm feeling a bit less discouraged, trying to deal with one crisis at a time. Right now the main issue seems to be finding a solution for the cats. The problem is that the exterminators have sprayed a bunch of chemicals all over the floors and we have to leave them for 1 month without mopping and walk around with shoes on at all times. This is a problem for the cats because they of course walk barefoot on our floors and lie around on them then lick themselves everywhere, thus ingesting the chemicals. Luckily our cats go outside and the weather is nice now, so they can stand to be out of the house for a few days while we implement a solution. A friend of ours is willing to look after one of our cats, and for the second one I'm thinking that I am going to purchase a large cage (been checking classifieds) and fill it with everything my cat needs-blankets, food, toys, possibly a small litter pan, etc. so she can stay in the house without getting the harmful chemicals on her. Since I work from home I can even let her outside during the day. I figure it's probably a better idea than spending money on boarding her, where she'll probably be caged all day anyway, and at least this way she can stay in her familiar surroundings. An8el, our landlord is paying for the extermination service but according to my neighbours he refuses to pay for anything else, i.e. the monumental dry cleaning bills, boarding the pets, etc. I don't live in the States but tomorrow I've decided to make some calls to find out if my landlord has any obligations in this matter.

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by dani »

JaneB, what an ungodly and disruptive hassle for someone who works independently :!: Here I decided to crawl in here and cuddle up with Mannix and Lynx and whoever else is available for my pain and find a problem at least as huge. Good luck wih this mess! I'm trying to keep my so-called career on track during an extremely painful time. The pain is a result of a dental procedure which caused facial neuralgia. I literally have spent days wailing in agony. Am finally being treated by a Neurologist which is helping enormously. But the meds make me extremely tired, so my life is spent sleeping and working. Right now, I have to get the courses I teach on track by Oct. 1 when the next dental surgery is scheduled--that's for two large extractions. One of them may help my facial pain. All of this major dental work is an upshot of the chemotherapy I went through last year, along with a craving for sweets during that time. I think I still kept up my daily dental hygiene routine, but perhaps should have flossed and brushed more often. Bummer! At any rate, I need to get my own courses done before the extractions, as I don't know how I'll react to them. As I recover from that I need to then focus on a course I'm taking at the same institution--they're free to adjunct faculty. Today, I checked in on the forum where my students are discussing term projects, to at least make sure they're on track with that assignment. I also sent another SOS to the Graduate Assistant about a component that needs to be fixed. I'm going to have to call tomorrow to be sure it gets done. So, I'm starting late in the month, but I really need support for getting all of this work dont during a very trying time. Thanks, dani

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by jewelB »

Welcome, Dani ! We're cheering for you. You are balance a lot of things. But you do seem to know what needs to be done! Journey onward! Lots of trials and distractions for many of us. "Cease!" I command to those unwelcome companions! I have been more off than on with this forum this month. Let me try to catch up (again!) Successes: My E-Course is set to start on Sunday. I have 5 folks joining me. This has involved lots of work, exploring and setting up a forum, teleconference. I've done lots of reading. I've lost 7 pounds (although I always think the first 2 or 3 don't really count) I am doing yoga semi-regularly. . . which is good for someone who doesn't move much. Many of the other goals remain untouched. such as I am. . . --jewelB

Jane B
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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by Jane B »

Hello all, dani, that really sucks about your facial pain! I really hope you can find the strength you need to get the work you need done related to your courses. Feel free to post here when you need support. As for me, the chaos at home is gradually resolving itself. One of our cats has been boarded at a friend's place. As for the other, I managed to find a large dog cage in the classifieds for about 40$ (not bad considering they can run up to 200$ new). I got a small litter pan and put everything else my cat needs and have been keeping her in there. During the day I can let her out since the weather is nice. She seems to be tolerating the situation pretty well. She's a very small cat who is rather fond of small spaces. I've been trying to give her more attention and kitty treats than usual so she won't hate me for keeping her locked up! I'm proud to say that during this whole crazy time I still managed to get to my band rehearsals and voice lessons. Now that these irritating circumstances are passed I'm finally able to get back to the stuff that really matters in my life, namely my concert coming up on Monday. Went out and bought a really cool outfit and put up a few posters and sent some email reminders to friends and acquaintances. Also catching up with the translation contracts I had to postpone to deal with all this irritating stuff. Oh and in other news. Some months ago, some of you may remember me mentioning my weird neighbour, a sort of shady man who wanted me to give him music lessons and seemed really pushy and the whole thing made me rather uncomfortable. Well I run into him frequently because he lives right next to my place, but he never brought up the music thing again. Until yesterday. He stops me in the street and is all "I would really really like it if we could do some music together, even if it's only one hour a week." I tell him I have no time. Then he starts:"Ok then once every two weeks? once a month?" I re-iterate that I really don't have the time and anyways I don't give lessons, though I can refer him to many other people who do. Then it becomes obvious that the music lessons were not really on his agenda. He gets a bit sulky and starts telling me "You seemed like a nice girl and I wanted to get to know you, maybe I can take you out to dinner, etc. etc." Ugh! I tried to dismiss him in a polite way, but if he bothers me again I am going to have to be more direct. Maybe even say something like "well I don't know how my boyfriend would feel about you taking me out to dinner" (even though I'm single). Sigh.

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hey

Post by Lynx »

Support radiates out .... Dani - very tough times indeed for you. May you heal rapidly and successfully. And all the preparations for classes sail along smoothly. JewelB - congrats on getting all those details to line up for your class. I recall the various steps you've posted along the way. May it lead to even wider and greater success. JaneB - bedbugs, boarding and caging cats, and annoying neighbors, putting off [paid] translations ... yuck. As for me, got reminded of my sad decade of losses today and have just given in to overwhelming feelings of loss. I'll recover, but I understand these are going to revisit for the rest of my life so I just have to be ready. It like a levee breaking and something inside had to repair it behind the scenes. L
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by Mannix »

Hi, everybody, Update on steps I listed last: 1. Went through about 5 more boxes in the living room. Found some more things that need to be preserved, also lots of junk. 2. E-mailed friend info on visiting the Turnpike tunnels. Haven't heard back from him yet. 3. Still on track to meet with person for my blog this Tuesday. I still feel like an unfocused mess. The work I've been doing in Alexander lessons has helped release physical tension, and uncovered fear! The result is I often feel anxious but physically less tense. :? I'm supposed to meet with my teleconference buddy on Monday morning, and I'm not sure what I'm going to tell her. It feels like I've accomplished some things, but the accomplishments have been very small. At least I've been able to get some things done and not completely given in to resistance. Lynx, thanks for the info on redecision therapy. From what little I've read, I think I could benefit. I can think of so many examples where I've made the choice I think will keep someone from getting angry at me, rather than the choice that will get me what I want. (What is it I want? Grrr... so foggy!) The inner child controlling that process, no doubt. Jane, sorry that creepy guy is bothering you again. It really sucks when one has to resort to a fictional boyfriend to get these people to go away. Maybe it won't go that far in this case. OK, my brain is about to stop working, so I will start fresh tomorrow. -- Mannix

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by spiegel »

32. The piano has landed! The piano movers assembled it for me, thankfully...they probably did just take pity on this 5ft1 ballet dancer :lol: And of course I sat down and noodled until my arms protested! 33. Laundry - all the dark-coloured clothes are now washed and hanging to dry 34. Sketched up some characters that have been kicking around my head this week 35. More piano-playing (am seriously rusty and my fingers are landing in all the wrong places!) 36. More laundry, the light-coloured clothes this time. The laundry basket is now empty :)

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by An8el »

yeah - laundry for me too. Separated the stuff that needs mending from the stuff I can wear and washed the last load of the ex's clothes to give away. Last round was a load of big fat towels. Now for cleaning the leather jacket that got slightly moldy that's been hanging on the back porch for the last week in hopes the mold would just fluff off. Now I'm headed toward moving back to my own house from house-sitting tomorrow. Will be cleaning the place and returning it to its pristine shape. Has been the most wonderful to have been sleeping for the last ten days in the posturepedic memory foam bed. Finally, the last traces of the sprained ankle that I've been nursing for months has completely gone!!! Got another house-sitting job for Oct. 12th-27th. Not sure if I should take it because that's when my friend's daughter will be visiting me.

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by Mannix »

Hi, everyone, Looks like it's truly been the month of housekeeping for many of us. Hi, Dani, welcome back to the thread. I guess there's never a convenient time to have dental surgery and you can't put off your course preparations. I think you're doing an incredible job getting through the necessary tasks while dealing with pain. I hope your extraction procedures are as mild as possible, and that you get some time to rest uninterrupted once all the dental stuff is through. Speigel, congratulations on the piano! You remind me of a lonely piano sitting in my living room ... probably jealous of the violins. :) An8el, isn't it nice to know our washing machines were running on opposite sides of the continental U.S.? We somehow never get out from under the perpetual dirty clothes pile. Lynx, my sympathies for having to go through your emotional release. I know you will get through it and be the better for it. I feel like Resistance is sucking me into a black hole. Last week, I wrote myself a scenario for an ideal job which I really liked. Then I went to look at it this evening to fashion a goal for my teleconference tomorrow. Suddenly, I didn't really want to do it. Arrgh!! :bash: I guess for now I'll stick to my house decluttering goals. (I've gotten rid of 12 boxes of stuff!) Sigh ... Frankly, I've been thinking about giving up the teleconference meetings for awhile, maybe until I have some more focus on where I want to go. My teleconference partner is very focused and maybe I'm just feeling inadequate or inferior. What a mess. Hope everyone had a good Sunday, -- Mannix

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Re: 150 Steps In September

Post by dani »

Thank you all for your caring and support. It really is helping me to carry on and I got a goodly amount of work done today. FYI, I'm on a high dosage of Neurontin which makes me sleepy half the time and functional the other half. I'm sure glad I found a Neurologist for that. Hopefully I'll have my progress report for you tomorrow. I'd forgotten what wonderful people there are on this forum and and awfully glad I checked back in. Love ya, dani :) (I'm having trouble with a full smile, so the emoticon reflects that)

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steady the course

Post by Lynx »

Hi I guess for now I'll stick to my house decluttering goals. (I've gotten rid of 12 boxes of stuff!) Sigh ... Frankly, I've been thinking about giving up the teleconference meetings for awhile, maybe until I have some more focus on where I want to go. My teleconference partner is very focused and maybe I'm just feeling inadequate or inferior. What a mess. Mannix I don't know Mannix, it could well be her focus is the result of your support. When I was finishing grad school I was in a run where it all seemed focused to another finishing grad student. I asked if she wanted to offer mutual support but she faded away. After we both go our degrees I asked her and she said something like what you shared. I hope we can recognize we are dealing with energies and blocks that only partially fall under our direct conscious influence. There may be lulls and dry spots, etc. Only natural. If our support partners seem to be having a great run at the moment, let's support them more and be honest about ourselves, to ourselves and to them. The energy will move back! You're doing great with the decluttering and I would hold to that goal and see it out. Dani, keep at it, that whole smile will return. About moi, watch a movie last night--music from the heart--based on the documentary small wonders. About Roberta Gauspari, a violin player turned teacher of violin to hundreds of students at three Central Park East schools in East Harlem. Watched the docu this morning/afternoon. Amazing story. She had a talent, kids, a focus and a goal to bring music into all of their lives. Got so popular that kids had to get in via lottery, but one boy who won a spot started crying that he didn't want to do it because it was "too hard." Real stuff. Uploading updates to our Mac operating system and getting antivirus software this week so my partner can use the computer at a retreat facility that demands those things before putting her on their network. Always makes me nervous because things get changed or the computer wants to know something I don't know about. Meeting with friends tonight (one of whom is returning from a study trip to India and another who canceled plans to leave town to make it). Want to summarize Senate Bill S. 1959 before the meeting. And celebrate the House saving us $700 billion contribution to well-paid bankers. (the bailout failed 228 - 205). I'm sure they will tweak it and try again on Thursday. This delays their getting out of town to run for elections so I know something is afoot. I'm saying too much. My analogy is a football team is behind 10-0 but scores a touchdown. The bench and fans and players cheer. But why? They've closed the gap and made the game more competitive. L
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel

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