150 Steps for October '09

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ups and downs

Postby Jane B » Mon Oct 19, 2009 1:46 pm

Hello everybody, Lynx, I'll thank you also for the inspiring Hesse poem. You are making some very noble efforts not to let misunderstandings with other people control your own self-assurance and happiness. A very empowering attitude. Sallypz, great to see you feeling so positive about your job search, and glad you can take the time to have fun with your autumn activities at the same time. paralegal, sorry to hear about your trouble with relatives and dance instructors. I hope in the future you'll be able to find another instructor or activity that will allow you to keep your spirits up. As for me, a mini-rant, but also a mini-success. I'll start with the mini-rant to get it out of my system and finish on a more positive note. This afternoon I was stopping by my band rehearsal space to pick up some stuff. I get there and find our keyboard player rehearsing with some other musicians. Musicians who are not paying tenants of the rehearsal space. This is a direct violation of our rehearsal space code of ethics. Currently, we are sharing the space with another band, and we have an agreement that anytime a member wishes to use the space for a project other than the two bands, they must inform all paying tenants/musicians and obtain their consent to avoid any conflicting usage of the rehearsal space. This is not the first time our keyboard player violates the code of ethics. He has a sense of entitlement that can be very frustrating to deal with sometimes. I am going to have to bring it up at our next rehearsal. Arrrgggghh. Personnel management sucks. Now, the mini-victory. Some of you may remember a bit of a rant I had this summer when I saw a famous musician whose press materials I had translated, but to whom I didn't introduce myself, fearing I would come off as a gushing groupie. And I was really kicking myself about it later for having missed this excellent networking opportunity. Well today I had a similar encounter at a cafe on the corner of my street. Ran into a semi-famous musician whose press I had also translated in the past, and this time I didn't hesitate. He was standing next to me at the counter and I just said "hey I know you, T, I've translated your press for the XXX label", and we began a nice little conversation. I didn't even really care what he or his friends might think of me. At the end he asked me for a business card, said he had translation needs from time to time. I was very proud of myself. I feel this mini-success comes as a result of my recent efforts to be more outgoing and friendly with the people in my surroundings. These efforts have significantly boosted my confidence in the past few weeks. JB
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Tue Oct 20, 2009 5:15 am

Jane: I'm really happy you went ahead and struck up a conversation with the other musician.
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby sallypz » Tue Oct 20, 2009 9:02 pm

Lynx--I do not miss all the nuances and misunderstandings of communications in the workplace. Seems no one there actually says what they mean & it's a guessing game. Someone's feelings generally get stepped on. Too many power games. PLG---feel bad for you. Makes me glad I have no parental problems any more (both parents are gone). A fruitful day today. I mapped out an educational course. By the time I was done I had decided on a double Masters program of study that I can complete by the end of Spring 2013. Mapped out all the classes required & when to take them, which ones to take online and which to take face-to-face. Tomorrow my daughter and I go visit the school. We have come up with a list of questions, info desired, and an itenary of what offices to visit. I've started the Graduate school application process--it has to be done by Feb 1st to start classes in summer 2010--I have 2 classes picked out for summer 2010. Since I can't start Grad school in Spring 2010 I have decided to take a 1 semester course that certifies me to teach Certified Nurse Assistants in Illinois, and a "RN Refresher" course, just to brush up on basic skills....and to get me into the going-to-school-studying mode. Next step is working on financial aid for school. I have found some ideas for sources to apply to...next I have to start aplying. Luckily, since I'm already a professional, all educational expenses, including travel, that I can't get covered by scholarships etc...are tax deductable for me. I'm very excited about the whole going back to school thing. Nice results from my job search.....not exactly a job....I applied to teach at a school that trains LPN's...the Dean of the School emailed me that they don't exactly have any jobs right now..but will keep my resume at the top of the pile because..."sometimes teachers drop out before the next semester begins". I consider that a positive result. I sent my resume to other LPN schools for an instructor position....haven't heard back yet though....but am hopeful. I feel like life is moving along in a positive direction & I like that. Lovely, warm fall day too..the tree in front of my house has turned the most beautiful shades of yellow and gold...it was a joy just to stand on the sidewalk and look up at its gorgeous canopy of leaves this afternoon. I really missed fall living in Florida these past 10 years. This fall it's like everything about it is all brand new to me & I'm pleasantly soaking up every second of it. sallypz (MoxieMe)
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Tue Oct 20, 2009 11:26 pm

Thanks Sally for your words of sympathy.
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby sallypz » Thu Oct 22, 2009 3:00 am

My older daughter & I visited the University yesterday. There was not much in their new-student presentation for Grad students, mostly for undergrads, but it was nice to wander around the campus and get a feel for where everything is. Visited the school of nursing and got some info there. Yes, predictions are there will be a growing need for Nurse Educators. I want to do a double degree to also become a Family Nurse Practioner. There is a huge demand for FNP's especially in rural areas where there is a shortage of doctors. This whole thing is part of my "retirement" plan. Since now my 401k has become a "101k". It looks like an actual retirement in the conventional sense will be impossible for me. My thought is to continue working on a part-time basis, 'retiring' from the stressful in-hospital type nursing, to something more fun like teaching and family practice, in a rural area, moving to a house of the edge of a small college town with a few acres for a horse and couple animals. I will be able to do my little 'vacation-business' part time with all my travel expenses tax-deductable. I'm thinking I'll probably have to keep working, at least part-time, until I'm in my mid-80's...maybe I'll even have time to write an be published in some professional magazines etc... PLG sounds like you had a great afternoon..watching the geese fly overhead in the hot tub. Sometimes a bit of self indulgence is good for the spirit. The Wisconsin countryside is always beautiful. The natural setting is very theraputic. Late hubby & I use to take Sunday drives often going from our house in Chgo. to southern Wisc. One time we took off for a short Sunday drive to the Wisc. countryside and ended up in Door County!! LOL!! Perhaps the fact that your dad's friends are dying off has something to do with the way he acts?? and the problems you have with him?? is he trying to exert control over the few people he does have left in life in order not to lose them too?? (but only managing to drive them away too) I agree with you it;s a good idea to know people of all ages. Another reason I think my Nursing Education/Family Nurse Practioner/live in a small college town plan is a good one...the nature of the work will lead me to know & be involved with people of all ages. & I will feel like I'm contributing something positive to the world something that will last into the future. sallypz (MoxieMe)
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Thu Oct 22, 2009 6:30 am

Hey Sally: I can relate easily to your retirement planning.
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby sallypz » Fri Oct 23, 2009 8:42 pm

More positive steps today. The director of the LPN program that had emailed me a few days ago about 'no jobs' called me today--good news--she said a job opened up and I have an interview on Monday---Hooray!!---the job is only for 16 weeks, one semester, but it's a good opportunity--it will look good on my resume and on my application to grad school--because it is a teaching job--and it will be enough to tide me over until grad school starts---I've applied as a 'student-at-large' for the spring semester which will allow me to take a class while I'm still getting my application dossier paperwork to the grad school for admission to the grad school program--I sent for college transcripts today to be sent to the grad school--a somewhat lengthy process as I've attended about 6 colleges gathering classes for the BSN program and after that for 'other' classes that were purely for interest--so things are moving along... PLG--it's been rainy here too in Northern Illinois---the kind of fall weather that makes me feel sleepy all day, like I want to hibernate--the leaves fell so hard off the trees that I can't see the sidewalk---my lovely yellow maple in front of the house is almost empty of leaves---Tanya's fascinated by the whole process---maybe tomorrow it will stop raining and we can rake the leaves into a big pile for the kids--I want to sit the baby in the pile of leaves and get a picture----he's 7 months old now and as cute as can be---must be nice--the biggest problem of his life is how to keep those little socks on his feet-the Sock Monster just keeps coming around to steal them------the place you described in Tuscon sounds great----I wans't planning on moving that far away---I was thinking more of, like near an Amish town---there's something nice about seeing people riding their buggies down the road that I like---but that part of my plan is in the future a few years down the road--gives me a few interesting vacation places to explore before then though.....there's even an Amish settlement in Wisc... Makes me feel good about the job--I hope it works out---they actually didn't advertise for an open position--it's just one of those places I decided I'd like to work there and sent them a resume, with cover letter----just in case something might come up......a lucky guess on my part... sallypz (MoxieMe)
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10 23 09

Postby Lynx » Fri Oct 23, 2009 10:17 pm

Hey Crews, Interesting all the good news and people finding their way. Jane, way to go striking up that conversation. Steady, practice. I sort of make talking with people a bit of a game. With women, it works to comment on an accessory (I've made a mini study of some handbag brands) ... Is that a Tano? Queen Bee? Coach? Not sure what the opposite would be for a woman initiating a comment towards a man. PLG - good for you finding a hotel you might like. Sally - hope you get the job too. About needing people to feel good. It's a mixed bag. I am familiar with Mr. Ellis. The challenge is I made my self very unexpressive until my 20s (I'm now 55). I remember being 24 and consciously restoring emotions to my expressiveness. My father may have had Asperger's, so I'm too aware of the overly cold and self-contained type. Actually, I want to be in the world, experiencing it, initiating and/or reacting to events. Feelings are very much a part of that.Of course, not all of it, or even the most dominant part of it. I love letting people help me smile and feel good! On the other side, natch, my happiness is dented by what other people do, so it is as well when I lose something, forget something, say something I regret. But I know I can move my emotions a bit myself, so I do, it take some being alone, some grumpiness, some grieving, what ever is called for. Lynx
Last edited by Lynx on Tue Oct 27, 2009 9:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Sat Oct 24, 2009 4:45 am

Morning:
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40110

Postby Lynx » Sat Oct 24, 2009 8:26 am

Hey, PLG, my turn to get a laugh: Okay gotta go. This motel has a lobby that looks like a living room, and if you can believe some guy gets up with this baby and his other kid and comes out to the lobby in their pajamas and starts acting like this is his house. So, I gotta get out of here. Is anything perfect. Slippage here. I needed to be on a conference all Thursday, it's in my day planner and Outlook, I had seen it all week, then I get drawn into a complex work challenge and totally forget it! The conf call was for a project outside my office I work on with the approval of higher ups. Many years ago I would really come down hard on myself for missing a meeting. At that time I made a deal to "allow" two a year, with accumulative totals. I must have dozens 'in the bank.' So I spent one. Still, don't like letting people down and giving the impression I cannot keep a calendar. This relates to a larger challenge. I'm working to decrease my hyper-alert or hyper-vigilant everyday feeling to something more relaxed. In the past, the more relaxed I let myself get the more details slip away (losing things, walking away from them in restaurants, forgetting conf. calls). There was one place I hadn't put this call—on my wall system. My office has a few quadzillion 2 x 2 in sticky notes from a past project. I use them on a glass partition to remind myself of what needs attention, like the orders lined up above the chef station in restaurants. I didn't make one. Alright, breathe, back to reading the notes from the meeting. Lynx
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Mon Oct 26, 2009 8:44 am

Hi everyone: Hey Lynx glad I gave you a laugh. Too bad about the missed conference call.
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Ex-anything blues

Postby Lynx » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:03 pm

The blues come in to get us PLG: "What a lot of work it is to be a nonsmoker." More like ex-smoker? This bring up my latest musing topic: bravery. Saw a documentary called Fag Bug about a young female lesbian college student who had fAg spraypainted on her VW. She took it on as a calling, in a way, and drove it with the tag all across the United States. I thought to myself, how brave. Then I thought, where's my bravery. Then I thought a bit longer, where is my bravery? Without goals, what's the point of being brave? If one doesn't suspect anyone is in a burning building why run inside it (unless its your job as fireperson)? I've been gradually giving stuff away. Now I'm getting down to some dearer things. Part of the brave part, the gutty part, is to find out just how well I can survive, dare I think thrive?, without them. I'm sitting with this. Lynx
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby sallypz » Tue Oct 27, 2009 10:54 pm

PLG--yes, in the beginning it was a lot of work to be a non-smoker. I quit some years ago. It was very difficult. Keep ip the good work. Hooray!!! Hooray!!!Hooray!!! I got the job I interviewed for!! It's only part time and only for 16 weeks & doesn't start until Jan. It's team-teaching through a local community college (in a 'for credit' class). It will be great for my resume, and right in the area my masters study will be. It also sounded like there is a good possibility they would 'renew' me after the 16 weeks was up and the job could turn into something more permanent. Their department is growing new programs in the next few years so it's a good time to work there. Since it's only a part time position I can also look for another part time position too. Luckily I don't have to worry about health insurance on myself. My late husband worked for the Federal government and after he died my health ins. became part of my (small) benefit package. Maybe life will take a turn around and improve!! I was doing nicely (comfortably) financially when I first moved to Florida (2000) until 2004 when Hurricane Charley hit....then everything just went crazy, financially, because of the hurricane damage. Funny thing, if the Hurricane hadn't thrown everything into such a mess I would have weathered this economic slump almost without any affect on my finances at all. Well, no use crying over the past, just try to pick up the pieces and move on. Rebuild in a new direction. Weather the emotional slump that goes with it too, rebuild that too. (I will admit that I was so scared about this interview that my older daughter drove there with me, she waited in the car while I went in for the interview, the we went out for lunch together afterward-----It was great having someone there for the emotional support---I'm very thankful that she did that for me---she always tries to build me up when I'm nervous, or when my self esteem is having a 'bad hair' day--we all need that help now and then). Next step is continue working on the admission stuff for the Masters Degree---I'm admitted as a 'student-at-large' so I can start taking classes---but have paperwork to send in to get admitted into the program. Only problem I have with that is they want to letters of recommendation from Masters Degree Nurses as part of the admission package---& I don't really know any!!! Even though I worked in a highly trained specialty of nursing the companies never hired nurses with a MSN because they wanted to hire people who'd work as cheaply as possible & higher educated people want more money---(I'll have to 'retire' from that particular special area of nursing once I get a Masters Degree because I'll be "too educated") Right now I have no idea who I'll get to write those letters. I offered them the Home Study and Psych Eval that I had done as part of the dossier for my adoption---but the school said that wasn't good enough. Lynx, sorry you missed your conference call---sometimes it's easy to get so tied up in what you're doing that everything else goes out the window. That's called "Flow". I guess nobody's perfect (Except for PLG---and her 4.0 GPA!!!---Good Going girl---now get a 4.0 in the non-smoking dept too!!!) Oct is almost over---still sewing my little girl's Halloween costume. I don't know why my kids want me to "make them" their Halloween costumes!! It's much cheaper just to buy them!! $16.75 for the pattern alone!!! WOW, has the cost of sewing things gone up. I can remember when sewing patterns were only 75 cents!!! The hand made costume will certainly be unique. I can never exactly follow the pattern---always have to add in my own flourishes. sallypz(MoxieMe)
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby sallypz » Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:09 pm

Lynx---two thoughts---the NW Indians (Washington/Oregon area Native Americans--the salish I think)--would accumulate their wealth with the purpose of giving it all away---giving the most away was an honor--and it made you the wealthiest---an interesting idea in a culture. What you said about giving things away reminded me of that. 2nd thought---speaking of bravery---I'm reading the book "Auschwitz" by Lawrence Rees---like the title it's a book about the concentration/death camp----I've decided it's a study in fear----fear on both sides. Fear to the point of paranoia from the Nazi's---and fear on the part of the jews (and Jehovas Wittnesses) that were sent to the concentration camps. Indeed those that lived through the camps and came out alive were brave. But bravery and fear are very closely aligned-----you can't be brave unless you first have something to fear. They are two sides of the same coin. sallypz (MoxieMe)
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Re: 150 Steps for October '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Wed Oct 28, 2009 10:25 am

What an interesting conversation.
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