150 Steps for November '09

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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Fri Nov 20, 2009 12:35 pm

Afternoon everyone:
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Unity » Sat Nov 21, 2009 5:13 am

Hi all wonder what is happening with you. Any progress on the family search Mannix.? PLG - have you considered doing voluntary work? you don't even have to literally 'go somewhere' to do it if you don't want to. You could do crafts from home. At least then your creativity would be appreciated. I did that for years - cross stitching squares which were made into quilts, making blankets -crocheted or knitted and other such things. Nowadays there are hundreds if not thousands of charities that want hand made items either completely made or you just make a small part e.g. some knitted squres. Or using beads and other crafts to make presents that are sent to charities for Christmas. Often they will send you supplies. Did you have headphones in the coffee shop with your boom box? I'm trying to picture this scene :D How are the Christmas decorations coming along Sally? Lynx - how are you? Jane - how have you been doing with your dating? Mango - how are the singing lessons?
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Sat Nov 21, 2009 1:45 pm

Thank you Unity for checking in.
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Mannix » Sat Nov 21, 2009 1:49 pm

Hi, everybody, Right now, I'm working on a first entry for my "grandfather" blog. I just want to write something about why I'm doing this and post it, so the blog will actually exist. Other than that, I haven't done a lot more research yet. I did put a request for information on Ancestry.com. Someone posted a link to cemetery records in Allegheny County, Pennsylvania. I typed in my grandfather's name and got a number of "Walter Lewises," but it doesn't look like any of them are him. Unity, are you thinking of Find-a-Grave? I type celebrity names into it sometimes late at night when I can't sleep. I never thought about putting my grandfather's name in there. I think I'd be a little disappointed if he did come up on it - that would be a short search, indeed. PLG, I don't consider myself a big genealogy fan, either. I just want good subject matter for a blog, and I've often wondered what my grandfather was like since I never met him. My mother-in-law is into genealogy. She lives in a small town in Tennessee. For awhile, every time she called she'd tell us how she'd run into someone in the grocery store or the library, started talking about families, and it turned out the person was her cousin! I think she's related to everyone in that state. I don't know if I'm a "serious" personality ... what's a basic definition according to the test? I think I'm serious about my interests, but I do let out a chuckle now and then. I'll have to post some of the pictures from Arlington Cemetery. It didn't seem like a serious visit to me, although you do have to behave respectfully when you're on the grounds. But I felt excited to be in the "presence" of so many famous people, and it was a beautiful day and location. Hope you're all having a great day! -- Mannix
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Unity » Sun Nov 22, 2009 3:24 am

Hi all Mannix, I was intrigued by your reply - that if you found your grandfather it would have been too soon. That makes me wonder about some of your goals and resistance. Is there a reason you want things to be harder than necessary? I know one of my touchstones is that I like to be challenged and am very competetive so perhaps that's one of yours. But I've realised that this can lead to a difficult life so I'm now trying to attract that need in other ways rather than interfering with everyday life. So even if you found the grave today it could still lead you to all sorts of unexpected areas that you didn't know about yesterday. PLG - are you feeling better today with all your good vibes?
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Mannix » Sun Nov 22, 2009 8:06 am

Hi, everyone, Unity, what I meant was I wanted to have a lot of material to write about in the process of searching for the grave. ("Blog entry #1: I am searching for the grave. Blog entry #2: I found the grave! The end.") But you're right, even if the grave is located soon, there will still be a lot to learn concerning these conflicting stories about his death, and relatives I don't really know. I hadn't thought about it before, but making goals seem very hard to obtain is a form of my resistance. I throw in unnecessary steps to keep from taking action. I also like my projects planned out, and I'm planning for the grave search to take awhile. So I guess I'm hoping things go according to my plan, but how often does that happen? :) By the way, the blog now exists, complete with first entry and a picture of my grandfather and grandmother. The address is http://www.grandpawalt.blogspot.com. Tons of stuff to catch up on today. Will write more later. -- Mannix
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby sallypz » Sun Nov 22, 2009 8:19 am

Mannix----Was thinking---even if you don't find your grandfather---what great material for a bunch of short stories, novellas, or novels you are uncovering...the whole search and where it leads you would be a great book...then a (fictional) short story (novel) about a man of his time period that gets hit by a street car and events surrounding that....and/or one about a man of that time period that is strangled in a telephone booth and events surrounding that (both have spiked my curiosity and imagination). PLG---(envious)--Madison is one of my favorite places in Wisconsin---because of the Univ. of Wisc, at Madison Hospital--they are so progressive (from everything I see about them) my 'dream' job for a long time has been to work there but life keeps me in Illinois (or Florida)----I must plan a visit there soon---thanks for the shopping ideas, sounds like fun. Unity--the decorations are coming along slowly. Tanya has been painting some wooden ornaments & I found some great material that I can cut into ornament shapes, sew and lightly stuff....Looked at the cost of (fake) trees in the store WOW!! EXPENSIVE!! (MY tree didn't make the trip from Florida to Illinois--no room for much of my stuff--so a lot of things were left behind)--hope the prices go way down after Thanksgiving--and/or real trees are cheaper. I would like some kind of a nice tree...wonder if anyone is selling nice (fake) trees used?? Have a bad cold--so have been doing reading and resting--have plenty of stuff to review for my jobs---got signed in for 2 classes in spring semester Graduate program at Northern Illinois University...found some more resources on-line for nearby programs that may be helpful sources regarding my adopted daughters Fetal Alcohol Syndrome---also figured that since I've been researching sources regarding Fetal Alcohol Syndrome anyway that I might as well put it to good use if any papers are required in my Grad School Classes use aspects of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome as the subject matter. 2010 is going to be busy. Keep praying my finances don't run out. Unity & PLG--lists of charities that want handmade items for Christmas can be found on-line...I'm sure this year with reported unemployment at over 10% there are many more needy people....the Occupational Therapy course students that my older daughter is in, is 'adopting' some families for Christmas...giving them Christmas Dinner and some gifts... Next week to continue the job search and sending out resumes...My little one is off school all week so will keep her busy making Christmas things....have a mini-sewing machine--will try to teach her how to use it... sallypz (MoxieMe)
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harder than necessary?

Postby Lynx » Sun Nov 22, 2009 12:09 pm

Thanks Unity for getting into my world this issue Is there a reason you want things to be harder than necessary? No reason, it's involuntary! I've danced, struggled, succumb, forgot, etc. with the polarities of difficult/easy my whole life. It's affected, infected everything, from romance to work. When I forget at times and treat things as easy I slip up! This keeps me at a vigilance tension that's too taut for my health. I'm exploring how to throttle down and still keep everything 'together.' The past week I followed a suggestion from a dream and have mentally been making a long list of difficult-easy pairs. For example Difficult-------Topic-------Easy Many dates-----romance-----"we talked for five hours" scripted----- performance ----- improvisation repetition ----- patterning ----- innovation decluttering ----- stuff ----- "this might be useful some day" I'm also more acutely aware that when I have a problem or challenge my body makes a unique suspense pattern of areas of tension and relaxation that shifts and adjusts as I navigate through the challenge. Not sure if I have the language yet to express this. I have decided that I want a different way of doing this and am finding out what options my body can suggest. Mannix, I looked at your blog. And your pix! You look so relaxed and friendly in that shot. PLG- take a deep breath and relax ... I'm channeling the 60-70s with you. Sally - I like how you're planning to get double value from your school - credit and researching something vital in your life along the way. Have a great day, everyone. Lynx
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Mannix » Mon Nov 23, 2009 7:07 am

Hi, everyone, Busy day ahead. The holidays are looming. My biggest challenge is not to let resistance convince me I'm not feeling well, too tired to continue, etc. Keep going! Lynx, thanks for the comments on the pix! My 4-year-old nephew took that picture! And I liked your comment on making things harder is totally involuntary. I think when that happens, there's a belief in play that needs to be examined. Unfortunately, I've also discovered that, just because one finds a counter-productive belief doesn't mean one stops believing it. One of my beliefs is: "Whatever you want will take you years and years to obtain." I guess that makes it safer, but also maybe is a self-esteem issue because I'm "not good enough" to get it right away? Anyway ... Sally, sorry about your cold. Hope you feel better soon. I liked your thoughts on making some of those rumors into stories. Now I'm imagining my grandfather being played by Johnny Depp in a movie! OK, gotta run. Have a good day, everybody. Mannix
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Mon Nov 23, 2009 10:25 am

Morning everyone:
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easy going and going without

Postby Lynx » Mon Nov 23, 2009 11:11 pm

Hi Mannix, interesting comment on your feeling that things take a long time. Was your birth at the end of a long labor? My biggest struggles comes from the internal selves calling, pushing, prodding, pulling in different directions. Often by the time I negotiate my inner peace the opportune time has passed. Another problem is my fantasy mind is so vivid that trying to get something in reality feels third-best. PLG- I use all CD's tapes, music, candles etc to relax. We've cut back on incense as so little serves our senses now. Actually gave away boxes of incense about two years ago. I understand about missing your former routine. L
"Vision is not enough. It must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs." Vaclav Havel
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Tue Nov 24, 2009 11:09 am

Hi everyone:
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Unity » Tue Nov 24, 2009 5:11 pm

Hi all I've been reading all the posts and keeping up with you all, feeling 'in sync' with a number of comments. e.g. Lynx and the different selves and that life can be boring after you've imagined it in advance. On the subject of craziness I completely flipped at one point over the weekend :? A very bad confrontation and argument. However, on the plus side, I think it 'bought me down to earth' and I feel ok about it, especially after speaking on the phone to the person concerned today. We cleared the air. Although if I'm honest, I was a bit taken aback just how angry we both got. And the thoughts I was having in my head afterwards - crazy! PLG, what do you mean by giving away the things you bought 'to the first girl you ran into'? What new pastimes can you find for yourself - anything you've ever fancied doing but haven't had a chance before? Mannix - are you winning over your resistance today? How are you Sally?
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby paralegalgirl » Wed Nov 25, 2009 1:02 pm

Happy holidays everyone:
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Re: 150 Steps for November '09

Postby Mannix » Wed Nov 25, 2009 7:59 pm

Hi, everyone, I got totally knocked on my butt by Resistance today. I was neck-deep in all my favorite avoidance patterns for most of the day. I did manage to practice the violin for about half an hour, but that's all. Hoping to brush myself off and get up tomorrow. Of course, tomorrow is Thanksgiving, but I can do some things - like work out in the morning since I didn't do it today. :wink: Lynx, I have no idea if I was the product of a long labor. I think my belief that goals need to take a long time is more a function of fear, etc. But some of the things you mentioned in your last post - inner voices going in different directions and the fantasy of something being so different from the real thing - really speak to me, too. Unity, glad you were able to patch things up with the person you had the confrontation with. You've mentioned similar incidences periodically since I've been posting. Can you look back and find a common thread that leads to the confrontations? Are there things you could do differently that might lead to fewer such situations? I'm especially curious because I had an incident this morning which usually triggers a confrontational impulse in me. Usually, when I follow this impulse, I end up feeling really stupid after the feelings have passed. So I forced myself not to follow the pattern today, but I still had the angry feelings, and I think that triggered my avoidance patterns. Is this anything like what happens with you? PLG, what great dedication you showed to your students. Do you ever think about going back to teaching? Or perhaps mentoring? Have a great holiday tomorrow, everyone! Mannix
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