150 Steps for January '10

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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby sallypz » Mon Jan 11, 2010 9:25 pm

Everyone has been so busy!! The beach sounds nice....even if it is cool there. I fight terrible procrastination moments too. Things just seem to pile up. Sunday took a drive to see what the neighborhoods some of the houses we found for sale and for rent on line looked like. Was fun, always have enjoyed Sunday drives....and we're minutes away from pretty countryside..,very nice. Today was a staff meeting at the school....took all day. Tomorrow to finish out typing assignments, get a lab coat, do some xeroxing . Grad school starts Wed. evening too. Work starts Thursday. Have to be there about 6 or 6;30 am....an hour drive from my house so I'll be getting up at about 4am twice a week to work. Thursdays and Fridays...so Saturday's I'm planning on my 'rest' day/grade papers day/do homework day. Had a lead on a teaching job for Mon. & Tues evenings but will let that one pass....no babysitter for Mon and Tues evenings....my older daughter goes to school those evenings. I was surprised about the self hypnosis not being allowed taught in school...I can remember being taught self hypnosis (although I don't think they called it that) in psych classes in college. Times have changed. sallypz(MoxieMe)
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby cyan » Mon Jan 11, 2010 9:47 pm

It's interesting to read what everyone is doing, specially you, PLG, with your lists. I can see I have to do more of that sort of thing. I got through about half my list today but... my new iPod (got it with amex points) arrived and I spent a lot of time transferring audio books into it. That's a happy project that will take a long time. I've decided to reward myself for doing stuff I'm not thrilled about with the prospect of sitting down with computer and iPod. It sounds weird but I listen to the books I love over and over again and it will be lovely to have them at a touch instead of having to go sync and unsync the smaller iPod I own. Tomorrow meditate exercise/qigong grocery shop study dust paperwork :wink: cyan
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby tapit123 » Mon Jan 11, 2010 10:09 pm

Hey sallypz- I'm amazed that grad school starts so soon and you seem to be on top of everything! Combning that with your work sounds like it will make for a challenging semester... I read a magazine article in the gym today that said one of the best ways to keep your resolutions (and commitments) is to try to foresee the bumps in the road and have plenty of Plan B's ready. Don't know if it would help you, but it really shook me into place. Mannix- I hope that your cat's doing OK. My pal Moose the cat who has been with me for 16 years is beginning to slide out. She's lost 1/2 her weight in two months, and we've done all possible tests at the vet's with no results. She's on antibiotics now to control some difficulty breathing and takes kitty tonic. She eats really well, but is nothing but skin and bones. She's almost 19 years old (I got her as an adult), so I know I should expect this, but we're enjoying every minute together for as long as we can. The vet said it was possible she could have cancer, but no tests showed anything. Even if she did, we're not doing the chemo/rads option... Since she's been my constant companion through divorce, moving, life changes, etc. it's going to be hard to see her go. PLG- I envy your conquering procrastination. It' still my bane, but am working toward beating it this year... You said you have lists for everything. When do you make them? Unity- I was fascinated by the past life regression exercise you described. I can see that it would be really helpful creatively. For those who wondered- I got the champagne soup recipe because I wanted something light and palate-clearing, but not a chilled soup since it's freezing cold winter and it was going to be the first course. You can find it here- http://homecooking.about.com/od/soups/r/blss11.htm Unfortunately, it had kind of a bitter aftertaste that I didn't like. I might try it again to see if I had just done something wrong. Today I did get to the gym for a long workout and worked a lot on the article and class prep. Got a note from the other university wanting my proposal for the fall class by Feb. 1. Yikes, I hadn't thought that far ahead! Good thing I have a backlog of classes I've taught before. I can just tweak them for this group's unique needs. Also got feedback on one of my plays which was really helpful, so I'm eager to get back to rewriting it. For those of you who checked out the kickstarter site, the fundraising there has stalled, and I'm desperately trying to figure out where to go next to promote it. I've emailed everyone I know, posted it on facebook (as have others), mentioned it in the forums on different sites I belong to, and am not sure what to do now. Any suggestions would be gratefully received.
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby cyan » Tue Jan 12, 2010 9:26 am

Here I go again. Some extra time this morning as husband is sleeping in and I don't want to wake him. Reading about the cats. I know how sad that is. I lost my 2 kitties at 16 and 17 and vowed now more. But my dog, Sallie, is rising 13 and last time she went to the vet he was worried. Fortunately, later that week when her scans came back her health had actually improved, but while I was waiting I looked online at cats and, for once, was in the right place at the right time. When I saw the picture of a rescue kitty up for adoption I didn't even make a conscious decision because I could see he was a snowshoe siamese and would be adopted by the first person who saw him, which was me. Besides being beautiful, he's very sociable. We even took him with us to WA on a 3 week visit to our best friends. They loved him. I wake up in the mornings with soft, silky fur beneath my fingers and big, blue eyes meeting mine. I can't believe I got so lucky. Makeup. I need to start wearing it. AGHHHHH! But when I see photos of myself my face seems pale and uninteresting so I suppose that task had better go on my daily list. Oh well, aging is not for sissies, after all. I'm not coloring my hair tho! And that's final... well, first we'll see if makeup helps. :wink: cyan
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby Unity » Tue Jan 12, 2010 10:31 am

Hi all PLG, nice to see you again and thanks for the procrastination tips. Can you access the trust fund money yourself without going through him? Hope you enjoy the new dancing class. Mannix, I think we're soul mates at the moment :D because I'm dithering like mad about a decision for this week too. Snowballs, I might have discovered what that was all about because later on after hearing yet another whack at the window, I opened my front windows and leaned right out. I heard a load of shouting and noticed the kids opposite were in an upstairs window and realised they were having a conversation with someone that was out of sight. So I guess the snowballs came from the hidden friends throwing them at the other house and because it's so quiet everywhere it sounded closer. They couldn't have thrown it at my house because there wasn't any evidence on my window panes. Last night I got so fed up with my avoidance of everything I even started having a panic attack. Later I decided to clear all the surfaces in my bedroom and just got on with it. So I woke up nice, tidy, bedside cabinet, dressing table and chest of drawers! And I started doing the filing too! tapit, thanks for the link. cyan, your cat sounds adorable
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby paralegalgirl » Tue Jan 12, 2010 1:55 pm

Cyan: It's so great to hear from you.
Last edited by paralegalgirl on Sat Apr 16, 2011 9:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
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absence notice

Postby Lynx » Wed Jan 13, 2010 1:25 am

Hey team, Weird day, but I'm getting through it. Realized I lost a scarf ($1 from thrift store) but as always its the lapse of attention/consciousness that bothers me the most. Also, forgot a business phone call due to being extremely tired from trying to wrap my head around new paperwork at work and out on a short mental health break. Uggh! And, this is a connection I forgot a call with two months ago. Double uggh. Walking home I prepared myself for the skittering of support I would receive from S.O. around these events. It worked out as I predicted, but I simply prompted her once or twice and gave her a 7 out of 10 for her efforts. Triple uggh. And told her I would do the rest of dealing with these upsets on my own. Going to visit family and may have limited email/www connections for a week. But I look forward to catching up when I can. Hello Cyan, Lynx
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby Unity » Wed Jan 13, 2010 5:34 am

Hi to all my fellow steppers, hope you all have a really good day. Lynx, do you need to go on the to-do list thread for that phone call? Good job I live alone as today I had a good old shout and swear aloud this morning probably because there wasn't anyone home that I could share things with. I'm fed up of always having to deal with everything alone. For about a week I'd been getting more and more worried about a decision I had to make about this week and I finally made it last night giving all my reasons and it seemed the most logical and safest thing to do in view of all the different circumstances that are happening. So finally I could go to bed without thoughts racing round my mind. Yet got woken this morning by someone phoning me reconsider. Sent me into a state. I'm over it now but at the time I thought I would spontaneously combust! :roll:
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On Vacation

Postby Mannix » Wed Jan 13, 2010 7:33 am

Hi, everyone, Today I'm trying to convince myself I'm officially on vacation. I'll be at home today, but no appointments except preparing for my roadtrip tomorrow. I'm still feeling anxious about going. Other times, I've been really excited to go down to the beach. I'll still miss being away from the cats. But I also have to remember that, once I'm there, I usually don't want to come home! I think being somewhere else for a few days will be good for me. Mentioned my anxiety to my Alexander teacher yesterday and he suggested it might not be related to the beach decision, but the bigger decisions I'll have to make this Spring. Examples - how much work do I want to take over when my gig friend takes her cruise job? That voice that's telling me I don't want to teach or do gigs anymore, what would I do instead? Right now, I don't know, so it's up to me to do the research on what I'd like to do, or even if I really do want to quit the music gigs. Since I have so much difficulty with decisions, this is a big deal. I'm also frustrated with my weight. I gained some over the holidays and, when I get on the scale, it's either still there or I've gained more! Maybe I need to go back and get a trainer or join Weight Watchers because I'm not doing the homework by myself. :? Unity, I have had that same reaction when someone's asked me to reconsider a decision. It drives me crazy! Doesn't that person know how much work went in to arriving at the decision in the first place? Hope you were able to stand your ground with them. Have you tried posting on the rant thread? Lynx, does your significant other seem interested in trying to improve her listening skills with you? Maybe if you keep prompting and telling her what you want, she'll get it. Cyan and PLG, re the makeup, I try to wear at least some powder/foundation or tinted moisturizer when I go out. And maybe some concealer. And lip gloss. I used to go to the gym without any makeup. Then I looked at myself in the car mirror and WHOA, major spots from sun damage! I think the makeup helps, but since I'm wearing it more, my face also breaks out more. And I wonder what's going to happen when I get older. I don't want to plaster my face with makeup, and I'm not interested in a facelift. Facelifts look so fake. Where is a happy medium? Cyan, our last cat lived to be 16 and then died of cancer. We were going to take a trip the week she died. We canceled it because of her declining health. My husband suggested I go to the beach instead and then he had to have the cat put to sleep by himself. I always regret that I didn't get to say goodbye to her. We weren't expecting her to pass away so quickly or I wouldn't have gone. Our new cats are about 4 years old and hopefully will live at least 16 years more. Glad you decided to take that new kitty, he sounds beautiful! And hope your dog's health will continue to improve! Tapit, wow, your cat is 19! Enjoy every day you have! The time passes so quickly, doesn't it? As for your kickstarter situation, have you tried publicizing on Twitter? I read somewhere on this board that a blogger got a lot of readers through Twitter. I'm thinking of trying that for my blog. Sally, hope your work preparations are going well. Have a great day, everyone! -- Mannix
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby mango » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:46 am

I'm still feeling anxious about going. Other times, I've been really excited to go down to the beach. I'll still miss being away from the cats.
My husband suggested I go to the beach instead and then he had to have the cat put to sleep by himself. I always regret that I didn't get to say goodbye to her. We weren't expecting her to pass away so quickly or I wouldn't have gone.
Um, just a thought... Subconsciously related?
'Living is a form of not being sure, not knowing what next or how.
We guess. We may be wrong, but we take leap after leap in the dark.'

-- Agnes de Mille
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby Unity » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:48 am

Hi Mannix, I was just reading your post about make-up and you asked about a happy medium. Well I ONLY wear lipstick, nothing else. And there wasn't a world disaster when I stopped with mascara or eye liner. Nor did I stop traffic, nor did anyone I spoke to collapse on the ground in horror! In fact, no-one has ever remarked on it or even noticed! :D I didn't actually make a decision to stop, it was my skin. After getting pregnant any make up at all reacted really badly with my skin and no matter what brand, or how expensive, it still didn't help. So I could no longer use it. Looking back at my life with make up and without, I really wish that I realised how pointless it is when I was younger and saved myself a lot of angst let alone money. But you don't tend to get to this point of enlightenment unless you've gone a lot of time without it and you realise that no one notices - including you! So you made the decision to go to the beach and you're still worrying about it. How alike we are LOL. I bet you will have a good time. And if nothing else, it will give you some time to perhaps get a new perspective on things.
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby tapit123 » Wed Jan 13, 2010 3:37 pm

Hey All- Sounds like a time of real change for all of us. I was really interested in the makeup issue, and loved PLG's description of the tubs of makeup, etc. I don't usually wear any, but I look at my pale lips blending into the rest of my face and decide I need help. Then I buy lipstick. Then I lose the lipstick after the first time I use it, and the cycle begins again. I do have eyeshadow to deepen my eyes a little, and want mascara but never get around to it. I also want eyebrow stuff, but ditto with the mascara. I figure if I had the right stuff, I'd dedicate 5 minutes a day to slam it on. It really was obvious that I needed it when I was interviewed on TV and looked like a ghoul... So I have too many different things going on. I had to sit myself down and remind myself that I should not go beating me up just because I have to make choices about what to do. Work on the classes, the elephant slide. Work on the elephants, the freelancing slides. Do housework, the exercise slides. It's like grabbing a handful fo wet mud! So today I went to the gym, volunteered a couple of hours at access TV, worked on my article and did the laundry. It's not 6PM yet, so I assume I'll be able to get a couple more hours in... Best to all-
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby Unity » Wed Jan 13, 2010 5:05 pm

tapit, I'm surprised you didn't get strapped to a chair and have make up applied whether you wanted to or not when you had the tv interview or was in not in a studio?
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby Mannix » Wed Jan 13, 2010 8:54 pm

Hi, everybody, Mango, did you mean I might be afraid my cats could be put to sleep if I go to the beach? I don't think that's the case because it's been 4 years since our older cat had to be put down. I've been back to the beach a bunch of times since then. I think I just hate leaving the cats. I hated leaving our older cat, too. Had a call for a new student today and was totally bland and blah on the phone. No enthusiasm at all. I wouldn't be surprised if the parents cancel our first lesson. I have either got to find some honest, positive energy with which to continue teaching, or find something to do that interests me more. All I'm communicating now is "burn-out." :bash: I did get a fair amount of stuff done with regard to my vacation. Still some more to do in the morning. I'd like to be down there before the sun starts going down. I'm still a bit anxious about going. But I'm reminding myself that once I'm down there, I end up with the reverse anxiety - I get anxious about coming home and resuming "normal" life. But like I said, I think it will be good to get away for a little while. Now .... how much makeup should I pack? :) Have a good evening, everyone! -- Mannix
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Re: 150 Steps for January '10

Postby An8el » Wed Jan 13, 2010 9:41 pm

Hi everyone! I'm like cyan - in that I'm flailing lately. So I've decided I need to be reporting my progress so I can recognize I am actually, in fact, doing something. My lists have mounted up so high that I can't deal with it, except to go around in circles, and give up and read another book. I know something is really wrong when I get completely freaked out at an ill-designed website where I'm trying to pay for a continuing subscription and I can't figure out how to do that because there are so many things to buy on there that are so unspecific about what you're actually going to get. It pretty much drove me to tears, and I'm pretty computer savvy. So my first decision is to suspend wishing that I could donate to the Haiti earthquake victims and forgive myself that I really don't have ANY money to donate. I'm going to quit torturing myself about it by looking at updates and news on the subject. In fact, I'm going to quit watching ANY news because it is just making me upset to watch suffering that I can't do anything about. Then my next accomplishment is figuring out how the utility payments got messed up while I was subletting. I'm part way through this, but at least I dove into it. Figured if I made a time-line for each series of payments it would be easier to imagine what was wrong and what I'm missing. (There are multiple people and multiple months and multiple utilities involved.) Tracking multiple emails to be figuring out what is missing is something I'm really lousy at doing. I talked with the person who has the key to my mailbox. She's finally going to check my mail for me, (the first time since I left in mid-Dec!) So this has brought things to a grinding halt that I've been attempting to resolve. So, we'll find out some unresolved mysteries tomorrow.
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