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Re: February 2019 Daily Stepping

PostPosted: Wed Feb 20, 2019 9:29 am
by Elaine Glimme
Hi, Lynx

Concerning dentists - your story is almost exactly like mine. Dentist retires, new guy steps in. Thanks

I didn't realize you were having tough times, Lynx. I thought your workshops were going well, and you were having fun with them. If you are having tough times, I'm wishing you good things.

tough spaces not times

PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:55 am
by Lynx
Hi Stepperteers,

Oh, tough contexts within the work: a Mayor who clearly doesn't want to do the intent of the City Council to the harm of my client, a leader of a project whose approach and philosophy and way of talking is like we're speaking entirely foreign languages to each other, a condo owner set who don't volunteer to split the work and who don't bother to understand the complexities of this property we manage in common.

Each of these have things I'll have to get through AND do the best I can to not turn into a raging fanatic. "I'll have to stand it, Blessom!"

Except for the condo, these are paying contexts. I don't like getting paid due to friction that needn't be there because of the wear and tear on myself and the whopping time I need to buffer for recovery/spiritual preparation.

I'll have to stand it whatever I would prefer, though, when the times come,


2-22 & 2-23

PostPosted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 10:17 am
by Lynx
Yesterday gave myself a day off and just wandered, changed plans, enjoyed a very nice lunch at one of our cooking schools, scanned books shelves in thrift stores, and walked 3 miles home after just missing a bus. Didn't feel I needed to wait for the next one and I use any chance for exercise in the winter. Life is a gym. Life is a gem.

Today, disappearing act as my partner and the two other board members plan the annual meeting and I don't want to be anywhere near this. We're in the midst of a debacle and I had a role (a positive one in my view) but don't need to stir that up and me as one of the other peeps just can't seem to land on common anything. Yuck and Sad — Sucks? Yads?


Re: February 2019 Daily Stepping

PostPosted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 12:14 pm
by Elaine Glimme
Goal for today
Choose a pitch and post it on Nano

Goals for the week.

Find three agents and send them query.

Work on ending.

You're never supposed to send a query before you absolutely finish the book, but I am seriously disheartened. It's very unlikely that someone will grab on to my e-mail within hours and ask for the whole manuscript.

My ultimate plan is to get a bunch of rejections and self-publish.

Happy steppin'

2.26 day of challenges

PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2019 8:53 am
by Lynx
Hi Steps,

Elaine, you seem "braced for failure" and trudging forth nevertheless. Jolly Good!

I'm braced for challenge. I have a stack of creative tasks to prep for a critical convening on Thursday. All of today I'll work on them. All of today I wonder how my client will not quite accept the work, not quite offer any recognition, not quite truly "get" how I think and approach this work.

When it's just he and I planning, it's hours agreeing to the most basic stuff, often minutes circling like water down a drain seeking something we both can hold to for a few minutes and move a step forward. I work :: start - middle - complete enough for now - repeat. He works :: start - tangent - can't complete if this other thing is not set - divert to other thing - repeat.

Ah, felt freeing to just putting this much down on the page.

Today, I want to experiment with simply doing the work without frying my emotions or mind in the process. I think somewhere I locked onto creative work requires a feeling of compact tension and a look of serious work. Probably a performance for a teacher long forgotten. I have a box of 'keys' in my tool shed, I'll try some to see what might unlock this ancient pattern.

And now, to the page with a ring of keys,


Re: February 2019 Daily Stepping

PostPosted: Tue Feb 26, 2019 12:34 pm
by Elaine Glimme
Hi, Lynx,

Yes, braced for failure - you got it.

"simply doing my work without frying my emotions in the process" yes! What is it with this emotions frying thing? That's exactly what's getting me into a dark, twisty place.
I hope you get a day - or better yet - lots of days without frying emotions. The world isn't out to get me. I know that. Why do I act as if it is?

I'm going to check the animal control website and the animal rescue foundation website, and then play solitaire. Then, maybe back to steppin'

fried or not fried 2-17-19

PostPosted: Wed Feb 27, 2019 11:07 pm
by Lynx
hi steps,

fast note. my brother printer toner began to fade, so tried a fresh one, and it streaked [off brand], so returned to the fading one ...OK enuff. just kept doing the next step.

feel most everything is prepped for tomorrow that I need to bring ready-made.

knot in the stomach time - -pre-performance jitters.

also, odd feeling of elation after making a very small practice stock trade. I've been regularly sending ca$h to my mutual fund, and it has been regularly going higher. Hm, fine. no elation. Used a huge chunk of my gains to pay off my mortgage, fittingly, as a huge chunk 20 years ago paid the down payment.

very small test trades, 16 share each, 2 stocks, figured the cost basis, got re-acquainted with yahoo finance. and at the end of the day I was up 3%. and I felt that odd elation. Is it due to "guessing" right? though my practice trades, and my real mutual fund investments are the end result of a lot of research.

Is it that the market agreed? I'm going to place more practice trades when it feels right and watch this. Following the thread of it will unravel my last tendencies to mania, if any are left.

turning in for good night's rest. Up at 6 am tomorrow ... yuck.