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Work in Progress...

PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2000 12:22 am
by Dax
Greetings the board, Being a perfectionist of long standing (now in recovery) it is my usual pattern to wait till everything is absolutely perfect before taking credit. Well, people keep telling me I'm way too hard on myself, so it's time to bite the bullet and claim success! (Even if I do feel more like a work in progress...) Firstly I would like to thank everyone on the board who has contributed to the various topics I have started in the last six months. Guys (and gals), this board has been a godsend for me in more ways than one. Four, to be exact! Image Firstly, after a difficult few months (which many of you (hi jacque and debG) will remember from my postings on the topic under the name deb goldfinch) we have successfully integrated my 14 year old niece into the family unit. I'm pleased to say things are going really well on that front. I'm still on the in-laws blacklist as a result, but find myself quite relieved not to be obligated in that direction any more! Secondly, I changed my name! We had a great thread going there for a while, and each posting helped me gather my courage and do the deed. And it hasn't been half as difficult as I thought it would thanks in particular to Snow Bear and his partner Mary for sharing their own name change story! Also Marlowe for his historical perspectives, ML for your confession (you know who you are!) and Peter Hornhardt, my neighbour from Melbourne, Australia, who must have copped heaps as a teenager! Thirdly, I've commenced a course of study with Coach U. This is so right for me it scares me, I've known it for years yet did everything in my power to resist/avoid, to my own great frustration! The good citizens of Sherland have been a great source of inspiration.. I haven't really talked all that much about wanting to do this, but I found once I went through the name change process that I was so psyched I felt I could accomplish anything! So I finally got the ball rolling... And fourthly, I finally quit my barely adequate survival job and found another one that suits my values and needs perfectly! And, it's really going great too - When I walk in the door I feel like I've come home! It is so true what Barbara says in one of her books, that you CAN achieve without waiting for everything to be just right. My house is still a mess, my cobwebs are now condominiums, I haven't cleaned out that bathroom cupboard that's been annoying me for years, and I still yell at my children on a regular basis (even when they don't deserve it *sigh*). These things annoy me a lot sometimes, but they don't stop me from moving forward in other areas anymore. I know this posting isn't all that exciting compared to being published or meeting celebrities, but in my life right now, these little steps are just what I needed. And if I can do it, anyone can! Take care all... Cheers, Rowan Dax (work in progress) Image

PostPosted: Tue Mar 28, 2000 1:21 pm
by Jacque
Heavens, yes, you do have a lot to crow about. Congratulations! (And while you feel your accomplishments may not be "exciting," they are impressive, particularly the fourth one to those of us who are still stuck in survival job Purgatory. Can you go into some detail about how you accomplished that? Specifically, how did you figure out what kind of job you needed, and what did you see that told you it was right when you found it? --<A HREF=>Jacque</A>

PostPosted: Thu Mar 30, 2000 11:15 am
by KKG
Wow! Rowan, don't you DARE deprecate your accomplishments -- they're fabulous! That's an enormous amount of change in a short time. And you sound really happy -- it's very inspiring to read about your success. I never saw the name change post. I think "Rowan" is lovely. (A friend of mine knew a boy christened "Lovelylegs" which heartens me when I think of my first name) Keep us informed of your future successes.(And if you should ever master the "bathroom cabinet cleaning" let me know how you did it.)

PostPosted: Thu Mar 30, 2000 6:42 pm
by Janie
Hi, Yes, I too, must say that your accomplishments definitely sound impressive to me. You have been busy! Thanks for your posting, It has reminded me to think of all of the "little" steps it takes to arrive at the final destination. I feel as though I really have made significant progress along my own way (and today I really needed that thought.) Have a nice day and thanks again!

PostPosted: Wed Apr 26, 2000 5:22 pm
by PeterH
Dax, you are a champion

PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2000 7:31 am
by gail
Dax, Thanks for sharing your inspirational accomplishments with us. It's so wonderful and honest to read that even though you have achieved some milestones careerwise, that you're still human--i.e. your house isn't white glove perfect and you still sometimes yell at your kids. At times I think I'm moving ahead with my goals and then look around the house and sigh and I still sometimes take out my frustrations on my 3 and 6 year old. It's hard to admit your humanity sometimes. But, thanks for sharing. gail

PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2000 3:09 pm
by Dax
Hi all, Thanks everyone for your kind feedback, I really appreciate it. Gail, hang in there... it's hard to feel in control of your own environment when there are others messing it up around you all the time (some spouses included in this comment). I've definitely had to lower my expectations with regards to the state of my house. But I find I can live with that for the time being. It is much more important to work towards overcoming the need for all conditions to be perfect before you can move on. That's been a biggie for me. Once again, thanks everyone, and I must apologise for taking so long to respond to these messages under my posting. The only trouble with moving forward is that one's available time drops significantly. Image Cheers all, Rowan.

PostPosted: Sat May 27, 2000 10:33 am
by kate
Dax - as a newcomer to this site, it's wonderfully heartening for me to read of all the progress you've made - and so quickly. Congratulations, it's very inspiring, and you made it sound so do-able.