by JeannetteLS » Wed Aug 12, 2009 5:31 pm
Remember my workshop space? That I put an actual studio in my home and how upset I was in April with the folks who torpedoed my dream? A friend reminded me that the original concept, Jessie's Voice, named after my late daughter, was to offer a place where writers or artists could come and do their work, without being interrupted, without family questioning the value of their activity, without worrying about the mess. That was the dream about six years ago. Well, when she was here one night, doing her thing, I turned a happy accident into a start for a painting. And over the last three days, when life has been nearly unbearably painful in every way, I completed my first abstract collage landscape. I have not had the courage to really simply go for it with a painting like this, and I finished it. And I LOVE It. Me. I never say that about my own artwork. I don't have a digital camera, but perhaps one of my friends will take a picture. But that isn't the point. I let myself paint away the worry, the shooting pains, the exhaustion from caretaking, and the emotional and body memories of the anniversary of my daughter's death. And the painting is joyful --all four seasons in New England. I acutally simply CALLED it New England Dream: Four seasons. I look at it and feel as if I could simply walk into it. So that's a success. And I managed to meet two deadlines, even for Stanford. SO the horrible couple of weeks have had some real successes. My friend with the stroke had another, but he made it. Long haul ahead nad I'll be having folks staying here a good bit. I miss reading things in here, but the point of what we learn is to go out and DO. So Ill "see" you all when life is a tad calmer.