I'm reading Barbara's book " I Could Do Anything If I Only Knew What It Was" and I think it's a great book with a very unconventional approach!
But.
There is a chapter in the book for students or those who recently graduated (I'm not ready to be born yet) and I like the idea that at the age of 20+ with no or very little work experience one shouldn't try to find a dream job, but just try to get a hands on experience in whatever seems interesting and fun, just to see what the corporate world is really like... well at least this is what I got out of the chapter.
And for some time this approach helped me to be less anxious about the whole "dream job" thing. I was planning to get some experience in special events planning (this is the last thing on my list of things that could suit me, all the others i already excluded after I learned more about them...) But I didn't manage to volunteer on any event because I was busy with my studies and probably unconsciously I didn't want to exclude one more possibility of finding my dream job...
I tried to learn more about events planning and I borrowed some books from the library...and oh boy these books are soo managerial... Like i wish i could enjoy this business language/diagrams etc, but it's just not me...I hate dealing with numbers/finances and budgeting and considering my skills i'm probably the last person who should do that...
So now again I have this anxiety and i have no idea what to do..of course I can still go and volunteer for some festivals, but I doubt that this is the best possible career for me.
Before considering events management I wanted to be an actress/singer/performer because this is what I did for about 8 years at school , I was good at it and i loved it. But then I took an acting course and I realized that despite the joy and satisfaction that i get when I'm on stage I'm not in love with theatre/film much enough in order to devote my life to it, and the typical lifestyle of an actor is definitely not something that I want for myself.
Then I did music production diploma as I've always loved music and cinema, so I thought that writing film scores could be just the right thing for me. But at the college I saw the realities of the working process, nowadays it's almost entirely desk-based job and involves working for hours by yourself, no interaction with people...at least not enough for me.
So now I have a much better idea of what I want my job to look like (creative as working on something creative, related to arts and culture, team work, contributing to people's emotions, flexible and with potential of earning good/very good money), but I have no idea what it is that I want to do...
And ideally I'd like it be intellectually stimulating, something diverse where i'd have to constantly learn new things.
So now I'm pretty much at the same point as before reading the book and I don't know what to do about it, maybe I just shouldn't bother with finding my dream job or with making conscious career choice and just go and work in some stylishly designed office. (i.e. commit myself to a long and painful death, or in my case to a rather rapid death..I've worked in an office environment in a tv production company and i was literally feeling my brain dying...)
Hope someone who has been in a similar situation can help me...
P.S. Barbara says that everyone has a dream, but what to do when you've tried doing what you thought was your dream, realized you don't really want it and is left empty with no dreams...