Positive Thinking - Let's chat about it...

[inspiresuccess]

I do have something I use that works well for me. It's a self-hypnosis tape called Manifest a Miracle by Dick Sutphen. It helps me get away from my negative attitude especially when I'm facing something I've tried to achieve before and failed.

There's cinema close to where I live that shows movies of the Bolshoi Ballet Season and the Met Opera season. They film the actual ballet or opera live and during the intermissions they show backstage views and interviews of the artists. Instead of paying the huge ticket price, I get to see ballet and opera for $20 per ticket. But no matter what I do, I can't find anyone to go with me. The season is staring again and my mind is going, "What's the point of trying again when you've failed every season before".

The tape is a relaxation tape, then allows you to visualize what you want to happen. It really helps me think things like this might actually happen and motivates me to try again.

I'm sure Barbara would poo-poo it but it works for me.

[jcjm]

Being positive is essential to some point.

You have to have be positive to even think about taking on an endeavor.

But after you decide to do it, you can toss your attitude out the window. then it become doing.

[inspiresuccess]

You have to... be positive to even think about taking on an endeavor.

That's true. You have to, on some level, think it's possible, even if you think it's incredibly unlikely.

[Elaine Glimme]

I think Barbara's objection to positive thinking, is this. She was around in the seventies, when positive thinking was elevated to a ridiculous level. And it seemed as if you could do anything if you just believed in yourself. And the corollary - you can do anything if you pray about it hard enough. (And if it didn't work, you didn't pray hard enough.) I think this kind of positive thinking is hurtful. Most people do. Barbara's answer to the positive thinking attitude is friends who help you when things get tough, and friends who know something you need to know.

Yes, after getting pumped up, you have to do the work. And I think it's hurtful to pretend you're fine when you're actually hurt, angry or scared. And I need the positive to balance out the negative. Too much negative is also hurtful, IMHO.

And sometimes, like if you're in the middle of a war, you have to hold it together, even though, obviously you want to scream.

[jcjm]

I saw a documentary on Scientology recently where the actor who plays Voight on Chicago PD commented that when he was involved with the group he would be saying positive things like I feel great when all the time he was thinking I've got a F---king headache that's killing me.

Kind of the same thing with positive thinking. What good is telling yourself one thing when something else is really the case.

You need enough of a positive attitude to get you started but also a big dose of reality to keep you on track.

[Elaine Glimme]

Exactly.

[emspace]

Barbara knew all along, of course:

From http://nymag.com/scienceofus/2017/05/self-esteem-grit-do-they-really-help.html

…it turned out that correlation did not imply causation, just as Baumeister suspected. Take a 1986 study his team reviewed which found that “self-esteem in 10th grade is only weakly predictive of academic achievement in 12th grade,” for example. Academic achievement, on the other hand, did predict higher self-esteem. It’s more likely that successful people with high self-esteem have high self-esteem because they’re successful than vice versa.

Long article but worth a read for the debunking.

[Elaine Glimme]

this topic always gets me thinking.
I'm a sucker for positive thinking and I crave external verification.
You can certainly overdo the positive, and reality does have the final say on everything, but I've seen people really get crushed by criticism.

All of us on the boards always support each other.